Ballard Street by Jerry Van Amerongen for January 11, 2013

Good dog, Mongo. That will teach her to use one those stupid retractable leads.Carl will now leave Millicent to deal with her hang ups.

Yep. Alex does seem to be playing without a full deck this morning… you can be sure that something is going to hit the fan!

It’s not Beatrice’s welfare I’m concerned about. I’m worried about the heart palpitations that Beviek’s going to have when she sees these guys. They may have to perform CPR on her….

I’ve had a long day, what with Linda’s birthday, and the cruise party, and all the post party festivities at the Tiki. I’m calling it quits for the night and heading for quarters.Night all !

I had a rough day at work, driving a bus in heavy snow. I didn’t get home until 23:00. Would somebody please get me a tankard of Jägermeister?

Good Dog!

Tied to the tracks and the train’s fast coming.Strapped to the wing with the engine running.You say this wasn’t in your planand don’t mess around with the demolition man.(My favorite part describes me to a T.)I’m a walking nightmare, an arsenal of doomI kill conversation as I walk into the roomI’m a three line whip, I’m the sort of thing they banI’m a walking disaster, I’m a demolition man.The dog is good. Make a great rodeo dog. Roped and tied the Heifer.

And of course no one’s gonna see that post because of Essex60’s post.

I almost hit a dog on one of those retractable leashes. Good thing it was a 25 mph street. I was able to stop in time. I really hate those things and the person who invented them (taking a line here from Garfield’s Christmas show) “be taken out and shot.”

Don’t just stand there man, go hold your finger so he can tie a decent knot!

Thank all of you again for making my 60th birthday one to remember. It was unmitigatedly awesome and so are each and every one of you!!

Dialing 911 right now…for the EMT’s to jumpstart Bev’s and my heart right now….(please dont let Fenton see this pic…I dont want him to feel he has anything to worry about)…

Essex60That will only get you into trouble. It’s like Funky Cold Medina.“Then she starts talking bout plans for our wedding”Don’t mess with it man.Especially make sure the girl is pure.

I don’t know how much Jagermeister costs in the US but last time I bought one in the UK (restaurant prices) it was £5 a pint.

It seems like FlyKittyFly’s nephew, WalkKittyWalk, is behind in his lessons with Beatrice…

…and this is one lesson that Beatrice may really want to learn well:

Fun bunch of picture comments today. I’ll be posting more when I’m back home, but not in any hurry (time here this visit is getting too short as it is

Good one! (Although, after all the oral surgery that I recently went through……I don’t think I’ll be patronizing that establishment any time soon! In fact, where’s my brain bleach tablets………???? I don’t even want to think about it!)

Mornin’ All….

A funny thing happened to me on the way to Ballard St. last night….

I think I fell asleep on the bus… never got off when it turned around, so I came all the way back home…

Didn’t pass Go, didn’t collect $200. At least I didn’t land in Jail….

Still shaking cobwebs out of my brain….

I’m getting confused about this Jagermeister thing….Briatollah wants a tankard-full?Pcolli bought a pint?

The only Jagermeister I’ve ever had is about 70 proof, tastes sorta like cough medicine (though I like it) and couple of ounces knocks me out.

It’s also quite expensive…. I’m not much of a drinker in real life either, and I’ve never had it in a bar…. but I once bought someone a very small bottle for about $10, which is around 6 pounds.

So what is this other Jagermeister one drinks by the pint?

On the Jagermeister issue its more of a status symbol. It got popular in the sub cultures and fancy rave bars as a status drink. Famous persons drank it so it became real popular. Crown Royal was the same in the early days. Now its pretty common. Now you see these fancy vodkas from France, Poland all hyped by famous persons. Runs up the price for potato mash.Now Glennfeddish (I know not spelled right) is expensive because it is hard to make and takes along time to mature. The club scene runs a lot on the popularity of a drink. Puff Daddy or P Diddy whatever he calls himself can just make a plain gin and tonic popular if he just says that is what he drinks. Now everyone wants that so it becomes popular. Jello shots I think are the strangest ones. Mix Jelly and Jager then allow to set up. Instant globs of alcoholic beverages. This was done initially to fool the Police when they would be called to teenage parties. “Oh officer we are just eating jello.” No booze here. Red Bull is popular when mixed with Everclear. “Oh its just an energy drink.”Not complaining just observing. I personally like MGD beer. Its locally made here in Fort Worth so it is really fresh. Now I will splurge for Rolling Rock sometimes. Good fresh clean taste. Reminds me of sharing a beer with my dad. In the Army if it had alcohol we consumed it no questions asked. Skanky Vietnamese beers. Chinese beers. Ewwwwwww.One time got a case of Coors. Thought we all had Fancy French Champagne for a while. Budweiser was the usual fare. It came in steel cans which we opened with our bayonet. Hardest part was getting it cold. One day in the field we ran across a booby trap. It was a Budweiser can filled with concrete with nails protruding. Nasty thing but we were amazed it was a Bud Booby trap. Captain had to keep a close eye on his stuff. He had that Glennfeddish. Would only share on rare occasions. I did find it very tasteful and smooth. I had been given up for dead after getting left behind in the field. Got side tracked and lost contact with my unit. Spent a week behind lines dodging patrols finally making it to the landing zone to evac. The neat thing is the pilot who picked me up I currently work with in my of work. He was a chopper pilot in the Nam and remembered picking me up. He spent every day for week flying to the zone and waiting then leaving because I had no showed. My Captain keep asking them to check. He said he had confidence in my survival skills. I am glad he did.

Essex…. it probably couldn’t get any altitude cos of the weight of all those pictures….

Also…. Laf In Larry said up there…

“And of course no one’s gonna see that post because of Essex60’s post.”

Referring, I presume, to the young women in the hot tub…..

I wish to remind him, on behalf of the all the ladies of Ballard Street….

Some of us are female!

Essex…. I’m hoping that’s fake…but then again…I was on a domestic flight a few years ago, when the pilot made what probably sounded to most of the bored frequent flyers like the customary ground weather report…But he was saying we were coming in at some spaceport on Marswhere it was 193º in the ground, with partial cloudiness from some kind of chemical gas…

Hardly anyone looked up.

Is this a fad these days?

Ummmmm ….???

Skatin’ on thin ice there Ess, skatin’ on thin ice.

I do hope Mr. Essex enjoys his new home….

to quote the Donald: “You are so fired….”

StelBel…. do you know how much WalkKittyWalk charges for those leash lessons?

Maybe if we all chipped in, the B.S. Ladies association could buy some for Mr. Essex, along with a nice sturdy collar and a strong leash…

unless of course he enjoys that.

Hi Linda…. what do you think?

Ooohhhh ess…. Ahm gonna back aways slowly now… Thot I’d drop in, but….. Um….. Ah thinks Ahl go count Mah sox.. An blessings tew….. Hi BS ladies…!!!! Free foots rubs fer all yall at the tiki tunite..!!! C’mon buy..!!! Luv ya..!! Munky :())

Good save, Monkey!

Essex…. hah!

Linda…. here’s the version of your picture I said you might prefer for your avatar…Completely up to you, of course, which you use, or for how long….I just wanted to try this.

I merely cropped it a bit closer, and adjusted the frame, so that the faces are a larger part of the image.Since avatars are limited to a certain size in pixels, the faces will be a bigger part of it, and will show up better.

You can try it, and either keep using it, or go back to the other if you like it better.

That is so unfair….you have my tears, my heart and you twist them….ok, I see how it is….you will share my laughter and thats a good thing…thank you…

and groveling is always a good thing…lol…

You’re too soft, Linda.

Give him an inch and he’ll take a mile.Or at least a kilometer.

Beviek…. the whole guys…. or just…OK never mind.

Linda did you see the picture?

Pilot, take me to New Zealand please…houses there are much cheaper and the views are astounding, not to mention that the weather is so much better than Minnesotas….

Fenton, give me three Slippery Nipples please and put them all on Essex’s tab…ok, now 3 more….thank you my oh so handsome boxer….did I ever tell you I like your short’s?….giggling….

picturing Monkey in a dress…lightly floral…with a belt, and accessories…earrings, matching ring…bracelet slightly off kilter to bring it all into line in a somewhat bizzare allignment…outstanding….now picturing the Sheriff….and that homogenously feminine image falls by the wayside…sorry for even attempting to picture you as anything less than totally masculine Sheriff….but seriously, you had it going on all femme, and you understood that a waist line is defined by a belt and not just an unlined base sleeveless mini dress….but its much more realistic to picture you as a fully formed Texas Ranger….you and Veteran both…

Fenton, one more Slippery Nipple for the road…then call the Polish food cab company for me…I have the munchies and need a ride home so you dont worry about me…Thank you sweetie….

I like those pix.

Hey! Beviek! Stop him!Sheriff!………. Monkeeee!!

C’mon, somebody stop that guy!

Where was it Bev? Where did you take that picture?

That guy stole my banana suit!

Oh no…. my banana suit!

Catch him! Catch him pleeeeeze!

Sniffle….

I love that banana suit….

(sob…)

Oh…. wait…. that’s not my banana suit….it has sleeves…..

Whew….sorry….

Um…. never mind. But really…. would you think there’d be TWO???

Good thing Essex is paying… cos I need a drink now…

Yes, Linguist, I saw your generous offer…. thank you….but Essex still has time to do….so to speak.

Fenton…. how about a …gosh… I guess after all that banana drama it has to be a banana daiquiri, doesn’t it? Please. On Ess, of course.

Monkey… are you here?Are you running the grinder?

I’m here to help out with that…. but I’d really like a foot rub first, pretty please….… even if you DID promise all the ladies…. sniff… But you do know how I like it.Hey, you’re kinda overdue for one yourself.Maybe Fenton could run the grinder for a little while?

Bri —

I really have fallen asleep on buses…not local ones…but I used to have a 2 hour bus ride home when I worked in San Francisco.

Didn’t take it every night… I had a place to stay some of the time that was much closer.

But when you take the same route for years, till it feels familiar and comfortable…and so is the bus… with bigger and softer seats than a city bus….and warm…and there’s two hours of mostly gentle hills and farmland…

I did wake up maybe twice at the end of the route…. luckily only a few miles from my stop….Not that bad for all the years I took it.

As for retractable leashes….

There have been several incidents involving people I know…and once my own dog (who was NOT the one on the retractable leash.)

I was going to tell what happened but I don’t want to depress people.

…. anyway, I just realised it’s after the turn anyway…. oops…so I will just say I will never use one.

Helloooo paper Dolly! – Cut it out:

https://cleoandcompany.net/january-11-2023/

Good morning Balladeers, (((((Plods))))) and Miss Susan.