Herman by Jim Unger for June 22, 2014

And patronise some other restaurant while you’re about it.

And go on a diet.

And don’t worry about tipping.

I’d like to order another waiter, please.

True Story:Waitress: I would recomend the salmon. Well actualy I would recomend everything on the menu.

Me: WELL I’LL JUST HAVE EVERYTHING ON THE MENU THEN.

I bought different mushrooms (well, different for me) because at the Farmer’s Market yesterday – I asked. Was even told how to cook. I was going to get Crimini – ended up with Shitake. … some change is good change.

When asked at Subway what kind of bread I want, I always tell them to just pick whatever they need to get rid of ere it gets old, doesn’t matter to me.Some look confused.Some look happy.I’m always happy.

Also at a Mexican place, I just order uno, dos, tres through the list. All is good.

I’ll order ala carte..Yes…everything ya got on that cart over there..I’ll have what she’s having..

“And have you ever considered deodorant?”