Cul de Sac by Richard Thompson for September 30, 2014

Sounds like a family member I won’t name. Good thing the other drivers can’t hear (him or her)!

My goodness, yes, Alice; now that you are four, three was so long ago!It is well that Beni not hear his dad’s “yells of helpful encouragement” until he is much older and wiser!

I encourage other drivers to learn the rules of the road so my children know better. Idon’t need to @#$ when I’m saying “blinkers are our friends, learn how to use them!”

I always swear that I won’t call another driver “@#$%”. I always fail, because there are so many @#$%s on the road.

So many words of encouragement, yet no improvement in driving habits on the roads In fact, they’re worse.

I can use one hand signal for many things, helps no one, except me.

Love the “helpful encouragement” euphemism.

I can recall feeling just like Alice with respect to some of my dad’s corny old jokes.

I’ve told this one before, but maybe someone hasn’t heard it yet, so here goes: I was taking some medical records to a doctor located in a hospital, accompanied by my three-year-old granddaughter, E, for company. In the waiting room there was an older man with a speech impediment. He appeared to be talking with the aid of a voice box. I was planning to discuss this with E later, maybe working in a few words on the dangers of smoking. However, I soon realized that he was talking like Donald Duck for E’s benefit.

Our local granddaughter, who is a stunner, once pulled up beside a young studling, and rolled down her window. “Nice car”, she said. He beamed and preened and thanked her. “Too bad it didn’t some with blinkers”, and zipped around the corner. (Right on red is such a blessing.

My kids think that “idiot” is a synonym for “driver operating a vehicle”. I’m trying to avoid introducing them to all the other synonyms I know for other drivers on the road (including the adjective I always want to put together with “idiiot”).

To keep it clean for those about, “Toad Head” works. There are a lot of them about the Indianapolis area. :-(

I always congratulate the loons who make it (at light speed) to the next red light before me…and, turn signals seem to be an option that most people resist paying for these days – get the GPS instead, eh?

“Helpful encouragement” is THAT what we call it now? I know I sometimes say that I swear at other drivers, but I mostly just say to them that that was really stupid or such. I mostly try to avoid driving at busy times of day and ignore the bad drivers.

My brother refers to all drivers who don’t meet his standard of driving (for whatever reason) as “cheese dogs”. My kids crack up pretty much every time.

I don’t think that was “helpful encouragement”