Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for November 30, 2014
Transcript:
Voice on Phone: Southworst Airlines. Can I help you? Rat: Yeah. I need a ticket from Oakland to Vegas. Gonna par-tay! Voice on Phone: The fare is $400. Rat: That's too much. I'd like a bereavement fare. Voice on Phone: Did someone die? Rat: My uncle Harry. Voice on Phone: It was to be immediate family. Rat: He was like a father to me. Voice on Phone: That's not immediate family. Rat: He was a father to me. Voice on Phone: You said he was your uncle. Rat: Uncle Larry was my father. Voice on Phone: I thought his name was Harry. Rat: He went by 'Harry Larry.' Voice on Phone: And Harry Larry died? Rat: As did my mother, brother, sister, grandpa, and grandma. Voice on Phone: They all died too? Rat: It was a bad week. Voice on Phone: And yet you're going to Vegas. Rat: We weren't close. It's getting harder and harder to get bereavement fares.
Sherlock Watson almost 10 years ago
This strip reminds me of Chinatown.:“He was my uncle! My father! My uncle! My father!”
Charlie Fogwhistle almost 10 years ago
Bereavement fares are not as cheap as planning ahead and booking your tickets early. So if Vegas is the destination, and “Par-tay” is the itinerary, you’ll be able to lose more monty gambling if you plan ahead.
Bilan almost 10 years ago
He can get bereavement fare on the return trip, when he’s lost that which is most dear to him.
Cameron1988 Premium Member almost 10 years ago
Rat, is definitely going to hell for making such horrible lies
Sisyphos almost 10 years ago
Gee, I thought Rat was a much better liar than that. He must have been having an off-day for lies….
Alexander the Good Enough almost 10 years ago
And here i was thinking it was leading up to a really awful pun. Now I’m bereaved. Not.
hariseldon59 almost 10 years ago
Rat must be related to George Costanza.
oldschool434 almost 10 years ago
Stephan should be able to get a reduced fare based on the state of his career alone….
vwdualnomand almost 10 years ago
airlines are horrible. pack you in as sardines. can’t leave your seat. no food or drink. and, they charge you for everything. bathrooms, more leg room, food, drink, towel, bags, etc…all are charged. need high speed rail.
bsqnbay almost 10 years ago
If he was flying to Alabama, Georgia, or Kentucky it is quite possible that Uncle Larry is his father. Keep it in the family!
rgcviper almost 10 years ago
Ow—I think my head exploded. Second time this morning after reading “Cathy”, too. Good one, though.
@PICTOFun poem. Thanks for sharing.
Number Three almost 10 years ago
Idiot!
xxx
A_NY_Outlaw almost 10 years ago
now he shoulda quit while he was ahead….
ShadowBeast Premium Member almost 10 years ago
It’s because of people like Rat that such things are hard to get.
Saddenedby Premium Member almost 10 years ago
hairy larry rat – hairy larry. *note – it didn’t say rat didn’t get a ticket – just rat said it was getting harder to get a bereavement ticket
Black4dder almost 10 years ago
In 2008, my father-in-law died while visiting Florida. We had airline tickets to join them the next week. Air Canada did not have bereavement fares. All they could do for me is cancel the existing cheap fare tickets so I could buy full fare tickets for this week. Not too impressed. I guess I should blame rat.
claire de la lune. almost 10 years ago
“Southworst Airlines.”Ha!
Carl Rennhack Premium Member almost 10 years ago
Rat’s relatives DID all die…of malnutrition while Southworst kept them on hold!
Carl Rennhack Premium Member almost 10 years ago
1)During the 1966 airline strike, people were told they could fly with LSD!
2)“Dr. Timothy Leary landed in Boston at 9:30 last night. His plane landed an hour later!”—Bob Hope
Lil Twiggy Premium Member about 2 years ago
southWORST airlines?