The Born Loser by Art and Chip Sansom for July 22, 2015
July 21, 2015
July 23, 2015
Transcript:
Coach: Four of our players are on vacation - you know what that means.
Wilberforce: I'm going to be in the starting lineup today?
Coach: No - we're going to go with just eight starters.
In elementary school I was always choosen last (I had a heart murmur and that meant I was never in great health, and everyone assumed that meant I was no goot at sports either). What no one realized was that since I was usually on my own I got a lot of practice tossing up the ball and hitting it, so I was a good hitter, but no one ever gave me a decent pitch to work with. One day the sixth grade class was out on a field trip so I actually managed to come up to bat. Of course the pitcher started signaling all the outfielders to come in, and just to add insult to injury he decided to prove I couldn’t hit by giving me a perfect pitch. I smacked that thing almost halfway to the school building from the ball diamond. If the field had had a homerun fence it would have been an automatic homerun, but since we didn’t have a fence one of the outfielders ran after it, but she never did reach it before I made it home. The next day when the sixth graders got back from their field trip they were choosing teams again and one of my classmates talked his team captain into choosing me earlier than usual, it took him a while to do it, but he finally did convince him that I really could hit. Of course no one ever gave me that perfect pitch again.
drolas94 over 9 years ago
Actually happened to me!
bphrball1 Premium Member over 9 years ago
How rude! Must be the son of “the born loser”.
loner34 over 9 years ago
I was on that team, only I did get to play (right field) when there were only eight others. PS. I once caught a fly ball!
Marathon Zack over 9 years ago
Well, they are the weasels.
patlaborvi over 9 years ago
In elementary school I was always choosen last (I had a heart murmur and that meant I was never in great health, and everyone assumed that meant I was no goot at sports either). What no one realized was that since I was usually on my own I got a lot of practice tossing up the ball and hitting it, so I was a good hitter, but no one ever gave me a decent pitch to work with. One day the sixth grade class was out on a field trip so I actually managed to come up to bat. Of course the pitcher started signaling all the outfielders to come in, and just to add insult to injury he decided to prove I couldn’t hit by giving me a perfect pitch. I smacked that thing almost halfway to the school building from the ball diamond. If the field had had a homerun fence it would have been an automatic homerun, but since we didn’t have a fence one of the outfielders ran after it, but she never did reach it before I made it home. The next day when the sixth graders got back from their field trip they were choosing teams again and one of my classmates talked his team captain into choosing me earlier than usual, it took him a while to do it, but he finally did convince him that I really could hit. Of course no one ever gave me that perfect pitch again.