Pickles by Brian Crane for December 07, 2015

That’s telling him, Opal!

Here’s a question for Earl: who’s gonna put the groceries away in the cupboards, pantry, and fridge?

Earl! You are just a plain old fool. Open mouth, insert foot and so on.

Duh Earl. You blew it! Why don’t you just help your wife?

If you have to rest from carrying a single grocery bag, then it’s time to recruit Nelson fro the job.

Might be time to hit the TREADMILL

Female version of lazy man’s load.

Guess Opal Doesn’t Want To Be A Millionaire!

Smart man Earl… I learned while in the service… Never Volunteer for anything,,,

Neither one, Earl. The smartest is the one who keeps his mouth shut. As Mark Twain would say, it is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are an idiot than to open it and remove all doubt.

My wife likes to bring them in and have me put them away, bringing them in is easier of course.

On the upside, there may be a snack or two in there…

earl, you are the weakest link

I use a wheelchair when shopping, and carpool with my father (besides my disability I help care for Mom). He gives me 3 bags- a heavy one in my lap, then one in each hand crossed over the first to hold it. Then I start putting stuff in the fridge, since that doesn’t have me walking around carrying items with the hand not on my cane- the bags are next to the fridge and I push ones that don’t have cold stuff or stuff that needs to be cold before we use it (ie canned fruit or juices) away and pull new bags toward me. The stuff that goes in my mini fridge and cabinets gets put in a bag on the counter by the fridge. Stuff we both buy but goes in my cabinet shelves in the kitchen (I only have an electric kettle upstairs for add-hot-water products like soups for cooking) from my bags, which are a different color, are next to my upstairs stuff. If I’m tired I do the fridge while he brings in the rest of the bags and usually he remembers that the can of lentil soup came form my bag and so doesn’t go to his can storage shelves in the basement. I have been known to sit down with a glass of juice for a minute while doing my thing, but that’s health related and Earl isn’t claiming arthritis or a backache or any other need…

In answer to Earl’s question: the one who sneaks away and pretends he/she doesn’t exist while someone else brings the groceries in and puts them away. My siblings and I were experts!

Sometimes, not asking the question is the smarter thing!

I insist on sacking. That way, the frozen stuff is together to go to the garage freezer in one sack, the eggs won’t be on the bottom, nothing is over 16 pounds (two gallons), etc.

I hope that can of pork and beans was painful!