Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for January 20, 2016
January 19, 2016
January 21, 2016
Transcript:
Stephan's Ex Wife: Stephan, your driver's license renewal form came in the mail. I filled it out and made you an organ donor. Pastis: What for? Stephan's Ex Wife: Because I'm giving you away, piece by piece. Pastis: Our marriage could be healthier. Stephan's Ex Wife: If you're lucky, I'll wait 'til you die.
BE THIS GUY almost 9 years ago
You already took his heart.
knight1192a almost 9 years ago
Remember Carlin doing a skit about the organ donor program, About how doctors seeing that on the license and they don’t try to save you. Course it’s not true (well if the doctors actually obey their Hippocratic oath it’s not true), but it was still funny.
PICTO almost 9 years ago
You had better keep an eye out for her Stephan.
dadoctah almost 9 years ago
I’m sorry, but you can’t have my heart. I left it in San Francisco, high on a hill.
AtariDragon almost 9 years ago
Note to Stephan: This is not funny. None of your made-up marital problems are funny.
Henry Robertson almost 9 years ago
How is she talking without a mouth?
Claire Jordan almost 9 years ago
It’s moderately funny – but the use of ‘til instead of till is a grammatical myth. Till isn’t short for until any more than to is short for unto, and in fact till substantially predates until.
Ermine Notyours almost 9 years ago
Nurse Bobbitt has come by to remove the first organ.
abbybookcase almost 9 years ago
“please don’t bury me down in the cold cold groundi’d rather have them chop me up and pass me all around…”john prine
Sherlock Watson almost 9 years ago
I sent my sinuses to Arizona,I sent my liver to Peru,I sent my lungs and my kidney for the summer to Sidney,But I’m sending my heart to you…(George Carlin, “Wonderful WINO”)
cdgar almost 9 years ago
Sounds like the IRS. They want a big piece of this and that, and they usually want it before you die.
cheesehead almost 9 years ago
Bitter?
Shimmery Mermaid almost 9 years ago
… no wonder he’s a ‘basket-case’! :P hug’z the ‘poor thing’
Sisyphos almost 9 years ago
That’s kinda harsh, Staci. Can’t Cartoon-Boy just stay in his basket?As we all know, he’s a basket-case….
ziggman14304 almost 9 years ago
Feel the love!
chromosome Premium Member almost 9 years ago
She might have him Unwound (see Unwind
)BE THIS GUY almost 9 years ago
All of meWhy not take all of meCan’t you seeI’m no good without you
.
Take my lipsI want to lose themTake my armsI’ll never use them
.
Your goodbyeLeft me with eyes that cryHow can IGet along without you
.
You took the partThat once was my heartSo why not, why notTake all of me.
All of meCome on get all of meCan’t you seeI’m just a mess without you.
Take my lipsI want to lose themGet a piece of these armsI’ll never use them.
Your goodbyeLeft me with eyes that cryHow can IEver make it without you.
You know you got the partThat used to be my heartSo why not, why notTake all of me
RyanMurphy over 4 years ago
this is the longest arc ever….I think he set a record.