Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for January 21, 2016

His savings are about to sink into the ether world.

First part of every procedure: A biopsy of the wallet.

Accountants don’t usually need a second opinion.

The last time I had a colonoscopy, I noticed a charge for an amnesiac.. I asked a nurse about it… She said, Oh, that’s so you won’t be able to remember anything that went on back there…….Man, don’t let Dr. Huxtable get his hands on any of that!

An emergency cashectomy!

Be nice to anesthesiologists. They, more than surgeons, hold your life in their hands. That explains why they have the highest rate of insurance of any doctor.

The bean-counters USED to just count the beans; now they control the beans; then in lies all of NA problems! Oh; yea; let’s add lawyers and MBA to the mix….

Most patients don’t get an anesthetic when they really need it – when they are presented with the hospital bill !

I’m on Medicare A&B and have part N supplemental through the ACA. We should have universal healthcare.

we need universal/single payer like Socialist Europe so we don’t have to pay twice for our medical needs. we already pay twice more than the rest of the world, only so insurance companies can screw us.

So what about the next class? Is their surgical practice for students or family or whatever?

american healthcare….so expensive. give us universal healthcare.

It cost me $250 to get one flushed, what made them think my wallet was in my ear?

Health care costs more than plutonium for the following reasons:Greedy doctorsGreedy hospitalsGreedy insurance companiesGreedy drug companiesGreedy malpractice lawyersStupid malpractice jurorsStupid patientsStupid people in generalSolve THESE minor problems, and health care reform will take care of itself!

unfortunately, some of them are horrible. I woke up in the middle of a surgery gagging and trying to pull the hose out of my throat. Not a fun time. Fortunately, I have had 5 operations since, one where the VA damn near killed me(really, sent home after 8 days and gall bladder surgery told to drink Gatoraide, wife unable to wake me, called amb and went to different hospital, where I spent the next 3 weeks recovering from zero potassium) and was wide awake for heart surgery at Cath Lab, 12 hours after arriving in hospital. Total time for heart attack, 3 days in hosp. Total out of pocket cost $10K as many Drs,/ER/Cath lab were not in the FedBC/BS contract. (so much for “great” fed emp insurance. Only thing I got in 20 years was the fact that they can not refuse insurance due to “prior condition”.) Hell, put the entire country into Fed Employee insurance. I paid, after retirement, $200 per month for myself alone. My wife has far better insurance, which unfortunately, I was unable to get into. Her yearly deductible is $50.00 and after she takes part A and B medicare, her insurance will continue for life as secondary insurance.

Was just there in November, got a survey from the anasthesiologist on how he did. Only talked to him for a literal minute or two before surgery, so only responded “I’m still here.”

Our son is a veterinary technician, and is noted for being great with anesthesia, especially on raptors which are easy to kill, so I think I’d trust him next time, the bill would be a LOT smaller!!

The last hospital I was in did the Walletectomy in the Lobby without anaesthesia.

Forget about it, Doc. Your students are asleep.

Remember, if you use helium, the pitch goes up……….