Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for February 28, 2017

As the saying goes you have no choice in the matter. By then it is too late.

But the place is full of lawyers and Wall Street dudes!

The term “financial advisor” means “someone who tells you what to do with your money.” There are no qualifications for being a financial advisor.

Here’s some financial advice, start putting money into an investment as soon as you can and do it on a regular basis. For a start get a savings account put money into it and wait for the next market crash. Then BUY! Preferably a Mutual fund. Yes, they charge but DIY with you life savings is not that great an option.

…and you’ve made the right choice.

The best advice their adviser actually would have offered was to eat at the cheapest salad bar buffet in their area and take along plastic bags to take home extra free croutons and dressing packets to increase their purchasing power. He wasn’t very good.

On my page is an ad for Fisher Investments discussing Retirement!!! Oh the Irony of it!!

Actually, CARL a financial advisor does have to have college courses in global finance, etc. and be licensed by the state in which he or she works.

And you asked Siri to get you to the financial advisor, didn’t you?

Welcome to Hell. You’re just in time for your appointment with a financial advisor.

Tough decision; One is a lying, scheming, evil monstrosity who would do anything to see you suffer forever. The other one is satan….

The bad news is, all professional financial advisers will end up there, too, probably still trying to sell something. Only those deficient in critical thinking skills will take advice from anyone who stands to benefit from you taking their advise. That goes for anyone from big name fund advisers to the conservative schmuck who tells you to buy gold, when he owns a piece of the gold brokerage. If you need an adviser, pay for one, so he works for YOU.

.Retirement is fairly straightforward. If you don’t have a pension at work, create your own with money coming out automatically every month, and forget about it until you retire; be debt-free at retirement, meaning don’t be a doofus and keep refinancing or buy a bigger house ten years before you plan to retire or think you need two new cars every three years; and it’s no secret what you’ll need for your basic expenses at retirement. Aim for double that, and you’ll likely never have to worry.

The best advice we got when we were in high school business class was to buy dividend stock in companies which products we use every day. Then keep the stock and see it grow, then re-invest the dividend to buy more of the same or other stock. When you get to retirement you should be able to have a nice income from dividends in addition to pension. It works.. Next, the teacher told us that if we are old enough is to buy a house and rent it out. When we get married, not to renew their leases, but to sell or live there, by then the house should pay for itself..Next, the teacher told us is if we have kids, when they are old enough to work, they can get a paper route, and use that for their own expenses and save half for higher education so that they won’t be saddled with debt when they finish schooling. That work would teach them to get better and higher paying jobs so they could save more..All of that advice works if people follow and adjust to their own lifestyle.

yikes. that’s dark. i’ll be right there with you in 20-30 years. but still.

Good on their resume: Top Used Car salesperson; Sold all Eskimos refrigerators and air conditioning; Takes orders from the bean counters; Absolutely no compassion when customers go broke.

I am continuously besieged by credit card companies and other loan offerings. One year I decide to keep a running total of the amount of credit I was offered, It was over $300,000.

.

I have two credit cards. One has no fee and I get cash back. Since I pay it off every weekend, it pays me to use it. The other has an annual fee, but one round-trip on the airline recoups the fee since I don’t pay for baggage. Also I think I have enough mileage for a “free” trip. It’s the backup card should the first card become compromised while I’m on the road.

But you get a free steak dinner with the financial advisor!

I’d rather eat shoe leather in real life.

Yes, well, they do say ‘The Devil is in the details.’

So, might as well get it straight from the horses mouth. ;)

Would this financial adviser be Trumps late great shyster buddy Roy Cohn ?

It used to be that if you need some exercise you went for a walk

Now you pay for a gym membership ( and a personal trainer )

When you needed financial advice you talked to your bank manager.

Now you have to pay a financial planner

The next thing coming down the line is “life coach”

Didn’t the trumpster just sign an executive order that basically says your financial advisor need not have act in your best interest.