Brewster Rockit by Tim Rickard for May 24, 2017

Is the spider’s name Shelob?

Why can’t someone explore planets a bit closer to home?

We should go with the one that’s too cold. We have a habit of warming them up.

The local Goldilocks has eight legs.

At least spiders don’t usually go for the spleen.

The next planet is too earthy.

Send Peter Parker to investigate it…

Is this what people are talking about when they say the younger generation complains too much?

Remember, our moon is in the goldilocks zone too, but I wouldn’t want to try breathing there.

But they have a great World Wide Web.

Now imagine giant man-eating spiders who are also like gods

Those Trappist planets would be fine if they didn’t have all those monks!

The spiders of Leng are known for their hunting intelligence and more. That includes having a language(s) and stingers. The bloated purple spiders of the vales between the Kaddath-Leng mountains are especially intelligent and adroit at catching and eating things like humans. Somehow the Lengites in the past got rid of them. No one knows how they did that. And now that they are broken said giant spiders have returned. You can see their silk glistening on the black summits and beetled escarpments of the accursed mountain range in sight of the onyx castle of the Yellow Emperor.