Pickles by Brian Crane for August 06, 2017

Maybe he forgot to take out the bricks last time.

now what was Opal doing sleeping in the guest room instead of the master bedroom?

Good plan, Earl. But did you remove those bricks before Opal spent the night in there so you wouldn’t catch her cold?

I need a new mattress too! My old one is in bad shape.

You’re all wrong: Earl tried to spring some weird sexual hi-jinks on Opal, so she bailed on him. Leaving some serious dermal damage. Earl’s looking for the iodine. Ouch!

My father always said “Never have the most comfortable bed in the guest bedroom”! He was in business and also said"I have to charge my family and friends because my enemies don’t do business with me"!

Changed my opinion of Earl – He’s a genius. Wish I’d thought of that 40 years ago

Much funnier if Earl said visited not visits

You need to insulate the guest room and door so you cannot hear the snoring.

How would you like to sleep in the guest room, Earl?

xxx

If it wasn’t for Earl’s explanation I’d say buy that new mattress. We need a good mattress that’s very comfortable since we spend 1/3 of our lives in bed. Our sleep is much more productive with a comfortable mattress. I love my bed now, it’s so much better than those uncomfortable nights on a sleeper sofa!

If you don’t WANT your guests to stay… KEEP THE MATTRESS!

I put boards under my mattress — am I trying to get rid of me?

I think it was Ben Franklin (in poor Richard’s almanac) who said, “Fish and Houseguests stink after 3 days.”