Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for July 27, 2017

Try telling him he is a narcissistic sociopath and see what reaction you get.

Could have gone off the deep end in another political area with people ignoring reality, but it wouldn´t fit on Rat.

well, don’t go pleading to the doctor, Rat, when you get real pain in your kidneys and you want the stones surgically removed

Rat has this pres thing down pat

The world is descending into chaos. Not imminently, but within twelve years and probably sooner.

Rat has the solution to health care. All illnesses are fake.

My one hope is that when the world turns into complete chaos I won’t be to old to enjoy it.

Rat, just make sure you can grab the nurse by the mousie.

The fun part is that he isn’t actually a doctor. He’s only trained in national socialist command and control economics, a discipline that has never found itself to be useful in the real world and only works in theory.

It’s not you. The world has changed.

the alternate truth is that he is healthy

Nothing has changed, Rat has kidney stones, he is just in denial.

Doc, it’s NOT you. Rat is just a dedicated Republican. ANYTHING they don’t like is “Fake News”.

Should have put covfefe in the eye chart

In time, Rat will learn just how “fake” this news really is.

One of the best and pithiest summaries of this topic that I’ve yet seen.

Before long, an agonized Rat will be telling himself, “I am NOT peeing rocks… I am NOT peeing rocks…”

Who needs facts…or complete sentences, for that matter?

That is bad news indeed.

It really is because I thought the doctor would have told him he only has a few more weeks to live.

xxx

Kidney stones – just another Chinese hoax.

Sometimes, self-diagnosis is a good thing. Working with disabled people, I had heard just about every symptom for every condition. When I started having certain symptoms, I called my doctor. I suspected diabetes, but did not tell the nurse, just told her my symptoms. She told me to come to the office immediately. They checked my blood sugar level, and it was over 600. That was in 1999, and I’ve been on type 2 meds ever since.

Anyone else slightly disappointed that Pastis didn’t include a hidden message in the eye chart? :(

I feel your pain, Rat! Or, rather, I felt it—back in the early ‘90s I had two bouts with kidney stones; quite painful, especially the first one. But both times, they passed or resolved themselves without any real intervention, except that i was more like Zeus than Sisyphos. As Aristophanes says in one of his comedies, speaking of rain, “Zeus, pissing through a sieve”; that’s what I had to do for a time. Sad!

Fake news just to avoid surgery. SAD!

A president who knows more about health issues than health experts? Prophetic!