Republican Edition; “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that not all men are created equal! There are the 1%ers, and then there is the scum! They can DIE for all we care! That just means MORE for US!!”
All white, rich men and their lobbyists, special interests, and corporate biggies are created equal to rule over everybody else. Only they have a mandate for life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.
Yeah yeah men men men, all written by and for only men….white men. There were no better times, just different times and some REALLY not so better. That ‘great again’ thing, so stupid short sighted. Learn history.
BE THIS GUY over 7 years ago
Like, all men are created equal. Like, they are endowed by their Creator with — you know — certain inalienable (or is it unalienable?) rights…
Sherlock Watson over 7 years ago
Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness would be so cool, dude.
dadoctah over 7 years ago
If it were written today, every sentence would start with an unnecessary “So,”.
Axeɫ handeɫ over 7 years ago
Stupid? why?.
Acworthless over 7 years ago
Whoever first said “all men are created equal” never spent any time in a locker room.
dlkrueger33 over 7 years ago
Or instead of THAT, he could have just added, “IMHO”.
Say What Now‽ Premium Member over 7 years ago
Or add; knowwhatimsayin.
Masterskrain over 7 years ago
Republican Edition; “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that not all men are created equal! There are the 1%ers, and then there is the scum! They can DIE for all we care! That just means MORE for US!!”
rshive over 7 years ago
It’s true, you know.
e.groves over 7 years ago
Today it would have lawyers involved. No telling what it would look like.
Kaputnik over 7 years ago
Still too articulate. I think that today, the entire document would just read…
“Dude.”
COSMICOMIX over 7 years ago
We’re, like, the people of the USA, like in order to form a more awesome union, bro.
rabizar over 7 years ago
Word
Chad Cheetah over 7 years ago
Does Stephen Pastis ever draw in peace?
sandflea over 7 years ago
All white, rich men and their lobbyists, special interests, and corporate biggies are created equal to rule over everybody else. Only they have a mandate for life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.
unclepablo over 7 years ago
They would have to shorten it to get it all on Twitter
Number Three over 7 years ago
Some people seem to have forgotton the meaning of “Equality”
Just sayin’
xxx
Cminuscomics&stories Premium Member over 7 years ago
They did not really mean it. Some were more equal than others.
Thehag over 7 years ago
Yeah yeah men men men, all written by and for only men….white men. There were no better times, just different times and some REALLY not so better. That ‘great again’ thing, so stupid short sighted. Learn history.
Sisyphos over 7 years ago
The cast gang up on Cartoon-Boy! Good job! Just sayin’.
Printer’s ink-and-feather him, guys! Then, ride him out of town on a rail (any train rolling-stock will do for the ceremonial ride)….
Chad Cheetah over 7 years ago
Reminds me of a joke in Big Nate, where they edit “Get a clue, you pnheads?” Out of the Declaration of Independence
PaulReadman1 over 7 years ago
It’s an expression that gets my goat. Unsurprised to see it gets goat’s goat too.
ND Cool Z almost 6 years ago
Where a baseball bat when you need it, Rat? https://www.gocomics.com/pearlsbeforeswine/2017/02/21