Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for December 23, 2017

I think, Rat, says these things on purpose just to screw with Pig’s mind

I LOLZED OUT LOUD!

(Also related to it)

Gives a whole new meaning to the term “on the rocks”.

You can always find something to worry about. Even if life is wonderful for you, you can surely be depressed that one day it will all end. In fact, there’s so much to worry about that I took the high road and worry about nothing!

This is how karma actually operates: bad people are incapable of being satisfied for long, so they are nearly always unhappy.

It’s the hedonistic treadmill

Rat is on his way to discovering the law of ‘Conservation of Joy’, ie, there is only so much joy to go around.

If you think you are happy, then you are happy, that’s what you’re happy for.

Nature abhors a vacuum.

Some people think the ice cube tray is half empty, others think it is half full, and others are happy when it is empty. Go figure.

The Unbearable Iceness of Being.

Pig likes British Coke?

Rat has no business being depressed. He’s the one who CAUSES everybody to have depression. Because he’s vile.

xxx

Zero-sum Depression is your game, ehh, Rat? Well, cheers (ahem!) on that.

Pig jumps on board the speeding anti-ice simile. Such a grammatical push-over!

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year, Y’all

Sounds like karma is an insensitive douche to me. Try telling that to someone who’s kid is fighting cancer. “Oh, be content that the other kid is healthy, you bad, dissatisfied person”

I don’t care if my coke (or any other soda) is cold or warm, just as long as I have it!