Pickles by Brian Crane for April 30, 2018

A watched pot never saw boils… it’s going to wait until you least expect it and then BLAM!

I think I’d believe a spider was gone….

but every once in a great while, a little teeny slug, less than an inch long, finds its way into my bathtub.

I can’t figure out how, unless they can come up through the drain…. even though that sounds impossible.

I pick it up with a piece of toilet tissue and flush it.

It’s the size of .. I dunno, a toenail clipping, maybe….

and I know it isn’t coming back…. but I always find myself checking again later, just to make sure…

and I just can’t use it till flush it again.

This is where Earl tells her that the drains all connect and that once the spider gets down far enough it can reemerge in ANY toilet in the house.

Paranoid much?

I used to suck up spiders in the vacuum cleaner and then put tape over the hose. And then didn’t vacuum for at least a month. LOL

Here’s a pro tip: squish ’em before flushing.

Should have hit it with the toilet brush first.

Ahhhh! Too late. I just had a spider’s eye view of Opal on the toilet burned into my retina.

Unless the spider looks like a Fiddleback, I just put them outside.

Don’t worry Opal. It probably won’t be the same spider.

There was a “Twilight Zone” episode where a man washed a spider down the drain and it kept coming back, bigger each time. It finally killed him. And, being “Twilight Zone”, it was all in his imagination and he died of the stress.

Ours lives in the shower. Can’t bring myself to drown it. Yet.

One of the smaller offices of our company had a urinal with a cockroach (they named him Benny) living in the drain. He couldn’t get out of the urinal, but no matter how we much we peed and flushed, we couldn’t get rid of him. Never sure how he managed to not get flushed further down the pipe, but obviously he was quite clever.

You don’t have to worry about a tiny spider, Opal. What you should be afraid of, is the big snake hiding in the drain pipe…..

For Opal’s sake, I hope they have another toilet.

I like spiders, even wolf spiders which we have a few of. It is all the other bugs I have a problem with. DIE! DIE! DIE!!! (Ok, I am good now.)

Remember the spider in the bathroom sink in the “Twilight Zone?” That still scares me.

That poor little spider. Send him a log to hold onto.

A toilet is not the same as a water spout.

and females… lay eggs.

#NightGallery

I am so busted. I have irrational fear of any creature having more than four or less than two legs. I am in total agreement with the young lady late Jim Stafford was talking about when he wrote, “I don’t like spiders and snakes.”

I’m sure the spider drowned while being flushed