The cartoon here addresses the problem with trying to build up SELF ESTEEM (a worthy objective) but using FLATTERY (a cheap counterfeit alternative).
Confusing flattery and legitimate self-esteem fails to differentiate between genuine self-esteem, which he dismisses as the weakness of “soft-hearted parents and soft-headed educators,” and the hollow emptiness of cheap flattery. Flattery is frivolous and superficial; a feel-good diversion whose phoniness is easily recognized and which causes others to feel degraded, if that is all they are worth. In contrast, sincerely identifying and building upon real skills, talents and achievements is like a genuine compliment that calls attention to qualities one legitimately admires in another person, in a way that rings true and reminds the recipient of the qualities that he knows best reflect the better angels of his nature. Flattery cheapens and degrades. Genuine self-esteem, built on real abilities and real achievements, resonates with the soul and forms the foundation on which to expand our best attributes.
The best educators, parents and coaches know the difference.
Nevertheless, no matter what you call it, there are kids who never received a compliment for anything, no matter how hard they worked or what they accomplished.
I know, because I was one.
I think I hear the snarks coming in already! Something about, how nothing I did was worth two cents, anyway, or something!
Although, sometimes I’d get compliments for leaving the room!
DD Wiz over 6 years ago
The cartoon here addresses the problem with trying to build up SELF ESTEEM (a worthy objective) but using FLATTERY (a cheap counterfeit alternative).
Confusing flattery and legitimate self-esteem fails to differentiate between genuine self-esteem, which he dismisses as the weakness of “soft-hearted parents and soft-headed educators,” and the hollow emptiness of cheap flattery. Flattery is frivolous and superficial; a feel-good diversion whose phoniness is easily recognized and which causes others to feel degraded, if that is all they are worth. In contrast, sincerely identifying and building upon real skills, talents and achievements is like a genuine compliment that calls attention to qualities one legitimately admires in another person, in a way that rings true and reminds the recipient of the qualities that he knows best reflect the better angels of his nature. Flattery cheapens and degrades. Genuine self-esteem, built on real abilities and real achievements, resonates with the soul and forms the foundation on which to expand our best attributes.
The best educators, parents and coaches know the difference.
Cheapskate0 over 6 years ago
Nevertheless, no matter what you call it, there are kids who never received a compliment for anything, no matter how hard they worked or what they accomplished.
I know, because I was one.
I think I hear the snarks coming in already! Something about, how nothing I did was worth two cents, anyway, or something!
Although, sometimes I’d get compliments for leaving the room!
Cheapskate0 over 6 years ago
What happened to Darsan54, Night-Gaunt49 and others?
gopher gofer over 6 years ago
⇧ @DDmansplainer
the best cure for diarrhea of the mouth is to simply shut your mouth…