Speed Bump by Dave Coverly for October 26, 2018

BAM !

Yes, I’m quite happy with it.

“That color will never do!”

No!

Me not even find outlet in it.

Not get any &%@! current!

The rock 2.0

“Well, it almost perfectly matches my fur.”

That rock you’re offering me will probably be obsolete in 6 months.

Does it come with a plan?

If you like your rock, you can keep your rock.

Is that why it was called the stone age?

This isn’t a rock, it’s a rock lobster

Yes, my pet is like family to me.

Give him the coal shoulder.

My rock! I will name him George, and I will hug him and pet him and squeeze him!

“Try Secret Rock – tough enough for a Cro-Magnon, but made for a Neanderthal.”

The neighbors have all upgraded to larger rocks. Gotta keep up with the Ugs.

My rock has Wi-Fi and high-res textures.

My rock is better than your rock, my rock is better than yours my rock is better because it’s not sedimentary, my rock is better than yours.

Rocks that roll are here to stay. They will never die.

…but wait! There’s more! If you act now…

Cue the theme music — Thus Spake Zarathustra

My rock came in a box with straw and air holes.

My rock is concieable and has a higher velocity.

I-Rock .05

let me roll with it