That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for February 14, 2019

Why men read the newspaper in the bathroom.

Sven is thinking; “If only there was some kind of pill that would prevent these children from happening.”

Little girl trying to rat on what her brother did. But mom’s too busy with the Woolworth ads, so she goes to gramps.

Santa Claus started looking for a job between seasons, the poor man could no longer tolerate that his grandchildren were asking him how much was left for next Christmas.

“Get a job (sha-na-na-na, sha-na-na-na-na)

Oh, when I get the paper, I read it through and through” to escape this fresh hell!

It looks like a different (and more modern) artist filled in the little girl; totally different style.

“Please hurry and finish. I need it for the outhouse”

“But grandpa,we can just use google maps on vacation “

Santa Claus reading about cupid in the tabloids.

The down side of a young throphy wife.

Why Karl Marx got into politics.

Grandpa, look. Grandpa, look. Grandpa, look what I can do. Grandpa, look, look. Grandpa! LOOK!

“Dammit – another indictment ! It’s a witch hunt ! I’m cancelling the Times, and going with The National Enquirer ! Am I not an ’inquiring mind?”

He’s still there, grampa, he’s still back there behind you with his stinky old frog. Grampa!

" Damnation ! Can’t a man read his newspaper in peace ? "

Now he’s looking at the situations vacant

Situations vacant

Just to keep his little mama satisfied

He went and bought the weekly classified

All for peace and quiet’s sake

Then he had to leave the apartment

And sought a less plush residence

And poor Suzy and Johnny had to skimp and save

Just to help to pay the weekly rent

.

Songwriter: Raymond Douglas Davies

Situation Vacant

“Oh, come on, Pops—let little Sally pick the horse this time. She can’t do any worse than your last five ‘sure-fire winners.’ I still say it’s so unfair that the racetrack doesn’t accept bets for last place.”

Why Gerry Garcia was gratefully dead.

Wanna buy it? It seems to be for sale. https://www.incollect.com/listings/fine-art/paintings/henry-bebie-the-sun-c-1852-117368.

Ha ha ha! That Garfield! He’s so funny!

I definitely need to rewrite this classified advertisement for two grandchildren for sale. Maybe I should lower the price as well because I not getting many responses to the current ad.

Hands off the grapes! I’ve got eyes in the back of my head, doncha know?

“The Handmaid’s Tale,” family-friendly version.

He was glad he turned his hearing aid off before opening the paper.

The Sun: 

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Hans_Heinrich_Bebie_-_The_Sun.jpg 

has info and links that point to info about this roughly A3 paper size painting.

https://www.the-athenaeum.org/people/detail.php?ID=1042 

https://books.google.com/books?id=9jSH20VIOpsC&pg=PA12#v=onepage&q&f=false 

http://www.schwarzgallery.com/catalog.php?id=84&sort=alpha&plate=29&menu=1&group=0 

all have info, or links that point to more info, about this artist (known has Henry after immigrating to the United States), perhaps in addition to what’s pointed to by the first URL. The last says he had no formal training, which seems remarkable to me, given the skill involved depicting the pages of the newspaper (upside down and backwards); personally, I find much about this painting remarkable (it’s only 16″×13″). This is the first work by him used here.

Again, a larger strip image is shown by clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #2138 (February 13, 2019) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment.

The ransom note we posted for these kids came out today.

Every day he check the obituaries, hoping to see his name there.

In today’s strip, our guest person is Micheal Douglas !!

Page 3 always makes me feel inferior.

Read me the comics, Grandpa. What’s in Non Sequitur today?

While they’re not looking, I’m stealing some of the Quaaludes!

“She reads over my shoulder, is an unrepentant backseat driver, and never orders dessert because she’ll ‘just have a little’ of mine. What I’d give to return to the peaceful days of bachelorhood.”

daddy Farnsworth, checking paper for openings at local orphanages, children are driving him bonkers.

What do I make of this? Why, I can make a hat … or a brooch … or a pterodactyl ….

“That’s interesting dear. Your horoscope says you can look forward to a couple of additions to the family…

…Gemini!"

I though all Swedes were supposed to be tall and blond. that woman (girl?) behind Grandpa is decidedly us-blond. She must be a Arab refugee.