Speed Bump by Dave Coverly for March 25, 2019

Sounds like he may not have the job much longer.

Pre-exit interview.

Uh-oh… I’ve been spotted!

“How many people work here?”

“Oh, about half.”

- Since when you work here?- Since I was warned they were going to fire me.

Quick… Look busy!

My employer and I have an agreement. I pretend to work; they pretend to pay me.

BURN!

She: How long have you been working here?He: Since the boss came back from lunch.

Rude awakening in the office….boink!

ouch

This would’ve been perfect with a rim shot after her last comment!

Thought this was The Born Loser?

Shouldn’t there be a DMV sign in the office someplace?

Let me re-phrase that, if you don’t start working, you don’t have the job.

Wally!

my wristwatch is working, does that count?

I have been employed here for 5 years, if you want me to work, you’ll have to pay me more.

I work with a guy like that. No, I work next to a guy like that. No, there’s a guy that stands next to me. O forget it.

I use to have a sign that read, “Any employee found dead in an upright position will be removed from the payroll.”

HR Director: “How long have you been working her?”Employee response :“Ever since they threatened to fire me.”