Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for July 17, 2019

They should give you a permanent leave.

Happy 61st birthday, Tentoes!

Also, I didn’t make this connection until just barely, but today is my dad’s birthday, too.

Apparently Rat did know what he meant since his word balloon spelled it “berth”.

Where would Rat find a mate insane enough to bear his child? Amityville? White House? US Capitol?

Fun with homonyms!

Rat got a plan.

Legally, you have a spelling to argue with. Realistically, you will be punned if you pun too much!

Too bad you don’t get paid while you’re on leave.

If the manager had his way, Rat wouldn’t ever reproduce!

Bucky Katt and Rat’s brains are wired incorrectly …….. Croc Power !

He should probably get some berth control.

lots of bowties in this company.

Don’t bother coming back, Rat!

“Rat, the odds of any female getting within 100 yards of you for the purpose of initiating a birth are statistically less than zero. Shut up and go home. You’re fired.”

How cute Rat looks in his tiny bow tie

….anything to get time off….

Why isn’t Pastis clubbing rat with a bat?

Wait ’til they start charging you for berth support Rat.

They don’t do that in this country.

Rat’s a right berk.

Just wait until he gets 6 months worth of leaves.

Rat: Post-partum animal.

No; berth as in “steerage” where we’re moving your office.

Since when does Rat wear clothes? And a bow tie???

Our dog will take our next paternity leave. I’m 76, she’s passed as well as our dog.

Because being rude to other employees makes you the office stud!

Some of these puns are stillborn.

We’ve had 15, maybe 20 years of this, and you mean to tell us you’re just now calling him out on the carpet for it?!

Rat, legally you don’t. But thank you for playing our game, and do try again another time.

Go for moor time, but they will dock your pay.

The folks around me seem to be able to distinguish, by pronunciation alone, words like ‘hem’ and ‘him’ which is magic to me!

This is why I never invite Cartoon-Boy to a party.