Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for November 04, 2019
November 03, 2019
November 05, 2019
Transcript:
hometown security the d.c. office of obstacles & eyesores hopes to replace the jersey barriers littering our landscape with something more aesthetically pleasing. but what? everybody loves bollards! we could become the "city of bollards." people: bollards! bollards! bollards! bollards! there are alternatives. man: tangled masses of abandoned grocery carts can provide deterrence and comment on our consumerist society. some are traditionalists - worker: i prefer the ornamental 8-ton reinforced concrete tub fillled with pansies, which so intriguingly weds the oppressive to the dainty. stop do not back up driver: yeah, me too. and what of those whom we seek to protect? employee 1: i hear that at the state department everyone gets a vicious guard dog. employee 2: damn. department of nonessential employees
J Quest about 5 years ago
So that’s what those things are called. A Jersey barrier, or Jersey wall, is a modular concrete or plastic barrier employed to separate lanes of traffic. It is designed to minimize vehicle damage in cases of incidental contact while still preventing vehicle crossovers resulting in a likely head-on collision.
Teto85 Premium Member about 5 years ago
DC has been a city of barriers for over 50 years. Thanks Ni*on, you dick.
PoodleGroomer about 5 years ago
Everyone should cast a line to a bollard and cinch the line on the cleat on their bumper when they park. There is no excuse for cars getting loose.
Joliet Jake about 5 years ago
Those giant planters are everywhere in downtown DC.
WCraft Premium Member about 5 years ago
Wall comments in 3…2…1…
Night-Gaunt49[Bozo is Boffo] about 5 years ago
One of my utmost favorites is the bollards page. Walls and eyes were mentioned so much in “The Handmaid’s Tale” to reinforce the idea of oppression on every level of Gilead. Bollards would be there too. Maybe more than what is already there before the 2nd revolution that obliterated the U.S.A. They would extend to certain neighborhoods where Commanders and lower officers live along with armed checkpoints to get in or out. The ultimate in a walled community is an entire nation. Not unlike North Korea is today.
Sisyphos about 5 years ago
Old-fashioned orange plastic cones just don’t get the job done anymore. A combination of bollards and 8-ton pansy-planters preserves and protects those who don’t have G.I. vicious guard dogs….