Richard's Poor Almanac by Richard Thompson for November 04, 2019
November 03, 2019
November 05, 2019
Transcript:
hometown security the d.c. office of obstacles & eyesores hopes to replace the jersey barriers littering our landscape with something more aesthetically pleasing. but what? everybody loves bollards! we could become the "city of bollards." people: bollards! bollards! bollards! bollards! there are alternatives. man: tangled masses of abandoned grocery carts can provide deterrence and comment on our consumerist society. some are traditionalists - worker: i prefer the ornamental 8-ton reinforced concrete tub fillled with pansies, which so intriguingly weds the oppressive to the dainty. stop do not back up driver: yeah, me too. and what of those whom we seek to protect? employee 1: i hear that at the state department everyone gets a vicious guard dog. employee 2: damn. department of nonessential employees
So that’s what those things are called. A Jersey barrier, or Jersey wall, is a modular concrete or plastic barrier employed to separate lanes of traffic. It is designed to minimize vehicle damage in cases of incidental contact while still preventing vehicle crossovers resulting in a likely head-on collision.