That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for August 05, 2019

Why do I now feel guilty and I’m about to be killed?

“Obviously no one would ever marry me, so I created my family.”

Why cousins shouldn’t marry.

Franz: I am going to back out of the room very slowly now. No reason to be afraid.

The little one is by far the scariest one. You just know she is the one responsible for dismembered small animals found in the neighborhood…

Hey, I’ll ask again, who of you ate my cookies? And don’t make those faces to me.

“Mommy, I want his liver…and onions on the side!”

Cover art for the new edition of The Need For Eugenics.

“Thank you for inviting me for dinner. What are we having? Um, you’re family sure looks hungry.”

Queue “The Adam’s Family” theme song!

Altogether ooky.

The family that’s POSSESSED together

Family portrait of the great grandparents of Gomez, the girl in front looks like a very young Grandmama.

“What we do as a family is our business not yours.“

That look the wedding photographer gets when he says, “Just one more shot.” for the 16th time.

Can you imagine actually having this portrait hanging in your living room?

Their eyes seem to follow me around the room.

After seeing the original cast photo for “Pretty Woman,” the movie studio executives required a few changes.

What’s really creepy is that ALL of his stuff looks like this!

Mit der patented hypno stare.

All Shirley Jackson book titles come to mind.

In this household, where blonde is exotic/ and everyone’s gaze is hypnotic/ Mom cringes, Dad drools/ and blonde Tatiana rules/ in a manner that’s baldly despotic.

Gads, that IS a creepy family.

“We have ALWAYS lived in the castle…”

Stilettoes or poison?

The family letting the artist know that they KNOW who farted, and it wasn’t the dog.

Check out the artist’s 1903 self-portrait. Clearly, he had strange ideas about what normal human expressions are.

Family von Lenbach: 

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Lenbach,_Franz_von_-_Family_von_Lenbach_-_Google_Art_Project.jpg 

(best viewed by Google Chrome, which can automatically translate most pages as necessary) has info and links that point to info about this oil on cardboard painting.

http://www.artcyclopedia.com/artists/lenbach_franz_von.html 

https://www.the-athenaeum.org/people/detail.php?ID=281 

https://www.the-athenaeum.org/people/detail.php?ID=281 

https://www.bavaria.by/experiences/city-country-culture/museums-galleries/lenbach-museum-in-schrobenhausen/ 

http://www.all-art.org/history458-2.html 

https://www.findagrave.com/memorial/168750143/franz-von_lenbach 

https://www.artrenewal.org/Artist/Index/1786 

https://thebiography.us/en/lenbach-franz-von 

https://www.wga.hu/bio_m/l/lenbach/biograph.html 

http://www.askart.com/artist/Franz_Seraph_Von_Lenbach/11198110/Franz_Seraph_Von_Lenbach.aspx 

all have info, or links that point to more info, about this artist (again, the last can be read in full for free on Fridays), perhaps in addition to than what’s perhaps pointed to by the title URL. This is the first work by him used here.

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (⌘- or Ctrl-) clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #2257 (August 4, 2019) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment.

Looks like they’re ready to jump the artist’s bones!

Momma always made Alvin wear the pretty blonde wig and the lovely red dress. Momma never wanted a little boy. They’re so…messy

The blonde is actually a young cousin Itt before the hair changed color and completely grew in.

So, you don’t call to say you’ll be late, then you sneak in at 3 a.m. by climbing the porch shed roof and jimmying the hall window, then you trip over the dog and step on the cat’s tail, waking and scaring the baby into a crying fit…and you wonder why we’re a little annoyed, Hermann?

Young Robert Plant knew that his unconventional ways would pay off big somehow, someday.

Anyone notice that Mom has five fingers?

“See de gal wit da red dress on? She kin chicken all night long…hey hey, whut Ah say?” (For you, Strob the Music-lover !)

the witch in red is scaring the family to pieces and are afraid to leave the house,

Dear old, rich old Grandma,“If we knew you were comin’ we’d ‘ve baked a cake,baked a cake, baked a cake.If we knew you were comin’ we’d ’ve baked a cake.How-ja do. How-ja do, How-ja do.”

In India you can tell when someone is a god by their lack of sweat and lack of eye blinks…

Yes we have a freezer big enough for a family of four, why do you ask?

Something weirdly sexual going on here!

Dad managed to lean in to the group portrait after setting the easel on “Auto-Paint”.

Police sought the artist on child cruelty charges after learning he made his family sit for a portrait for 96 hours without a meal break, but they never found a trace.