Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for August 26, 2019

Pig, you just happen to be standing in the bullseye.

why, oh why, world, are you picking on me?

It could be worse, Pig. You could be my breakfast this morning!

Although, I guess nobody would pick at you if you were. Everybody loves bacon.

Pig is a person?

sounds kind of like the Coasters’ “Charlie Brown” song

But your turn is not over yet!

I’ve discovered that when what I’m doing causes me pain, I pretty quickly figure out how not to do that. I suspect pig’s got a habit that results in him being picked on.

But Pig, you’re so tasty that the world wants you!

Given my experience with Google Maps, it’s a wonder the World even managed to find Pig.

Sorry Pig, the World has dropped a red pin on you.

Nope – it picks on all 7 billion of us, not just you pig.

What’s with the black marks on his face? ( besides his eyes)

Pig be glad you are not Verne from “OTH” . The world keeps dropping cows on him ! … Croc Power !

The world is not very picky when picking on someone.

Just the world, I’ve got the universe on my case.

Don’t be an easy target. Keep your mouth shut, your eyes open and your wallet closed and you’ll be just fine. Violate any of those conditions and someone somewhere has you in their sights.

Not to be confused with the Desiderata, I give you the Deteriorata: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LA7383noev8

You are a fluke, of the universe…..

Pig, there’s no point appealing to World. World is just another Alphabet subsidiary, following orders.

Where’s the crocs? " Zeeba nabors" too!

PIG is freaking ….again…

And Rat is RIGHT NEXT TO ME.

“OK, Pig, I guess you’ve had enough for now. Hello, Mr. RAT! Your turn!”

Time to fight back.

The world is laughing at you, Pig

Coulda sworn it was 8 billion. Either incorrect data… or people been slackin’.

And did Pig just wish his troubles on some other person? I would believe that of Rat, but that is so unlike Pig.

World, why are you picking on the meek who will inherit you?

If you really want pick on somebody, there are at least 535 who truly deserve a good worldly harassment – and then, there’s that twitter bug down the street on Pennsylvania Avenue.

Try finding someone’s phone number on line. I dare you. Long ago and far away, I’d grab the book(s) next to the phone, and bingo in 10-seconds I had it. Admittedly once it took a little longer to find the number of the girl I just met from her address. I found it and 4-years later married her and 54 years later buried her. Damn! (Oh, yes her name and number was in the mid-Ts, I called and asked “Is this the girl I went out with last night?” And she instantly replied, “No.”)

Did he just tell the world to stop pigging out?

I’ve heard it said that those whom God loves most, He tests most.

I know the feeling. Believe me, I know the feeling!

Keep a low profile.

But Pig, if it weren’t for a lazy world, we’d have no world at all. You wouldn’t like that, even more….