Played in a jazz trio with the head accountant of John Deere (pianist), and a mortician (played upright bass.) Bill, the mortician was one of the most happy upbeat guys I have ever met. Maynard, the piano player was one of the most negative. The two of them were like something you would see in a comedy series. I remember one job, a wedding reception being held in a school. I was setting up my drums when Bill came walking in. He would wave and greet almost everybody; they would smile and greet him in return. He said something like, “This is going to be fun. Everybody’s gonna have a great time.” 10 minutes or so later, Maynard walks in. The first thing he says is, “Can you believe they are holding a wedding reception in this place? Look at all the people; they’re miserable.” Bill, who had been playing with Maynard for over 20 years looked at me and gave me a knowing wink; like, yeah he’s always been like this.
Liverlips McCracken Premium Member over 4 years ago
Hah! Mortician humor! I love it. Every profession has to have some of those.
pschearer Premium Member over 4 years ago
I laughed. A long and satisfying laugh. While I still can.
Zykoic over 4 years ago
Well, I’ll be shoveling off then.
Stephen Runnels over 4 years ago
Ah, the fun part was to give my card to someone complaining about not feeling well. Now with COVID-19, not that funny anymore.
HappyDog/ᵀʳʸ ᴮᵒᶻᵒ ⁴ ᵗʰᵉ ᶠᵘⁿ ᵒᶠ ᶦᵗ Premium Member over 4 years ago
“Not if I see you first” comes to mind.
theincrediblebulk over 4 years ago
talk about ultimate job security in these dangerous days.
J Short over 4 years ago
Played in a jazz trio with the head accountant of John Deere (pianist), and a mortician (played upright bass.) Bill, the mortician was one of the most happy upbeat guys I have ever met. Maynard, the piano player was one of the most negative. The two of them were like something you would see in a comedy series. I remember one job, a wedding reception being held in a school. I was setting up my drums when Bill came walking in. He would wave and greet almost everybody; they would smile and greet him in return. He said something like, “This is going to be fun. Everybody’s gonna have a great time.” 10 minutes or so later, Maynard walks in. The first thing he says is, “Can you believe they are holding a wedding reception in this place? Look at all the people; they’re miserable.” Bill, who had been playing with Maynard for over 20 years looked at me and gave me a knowing wink; like, yeah he’s always been like this.
WCraft Premium Member over 4 years ago
How apropos…not sure if I should laugh…
Gameguy49 Premium Member over 4 years ago
I’ll see you later, you won’t see me.
Sailor46 USN 65-95 over 4 years ago
I’m friends with a Mortician, she’s a very interesting lady.
Charlie Fogwhistle over 4 years ago
So a very old lady attended a friend’s funeral, and after it was over she approached the funeral director to compliment him.
“The service was wonderful, and so thoughtful. I’ve decided that when I die I’d like to have you do my service.”
“Thank you, Ma’am. I appreciate your compliment. If you wouldn’t mind, might I ask just old old you are?”
“I’m 103 years old” she said.
“That’s incredible”, the mortician replied. “Hardly makes sense to go home, does it?”
tinstar over 4 years ago
So, you’re a mortician? Yup. Must be hard work. How do you sleep? Like the dead.