Rubes by Leigh Rubin for March 27, 2020

Before enlightenment: Chop wood, carry water.

After enlightenment: Chop wood, carry water.

Enlightenment cannot be attained by seeking it in the real world. Fitbit or not.

You attain enlightenment by believing you can attain enlightenment.

“A journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.” But they don’t tell you how many it’s gonna take.

(Well, actually it’s not hard to figure out. A mile was originally a thousand paces of a Roman soldier.)

The corns this guy will accumulate on his feet….

One principle of Zen is that in order to obtain something, you must stop wanting it. So I’m going to just sit right where I am.

Doesn’t sound easy. I’ll just stay unenlightened, thank you.

I hope he hasn’t bitten off more than he can chew. He might have a spiritual fit.

“the spiritually Fitbit”? Presumably they mean either “spirituality” or “spiritual”, but an adjective is needed there, not an adverb.