For Better or For Worse by Lynn Johnston for November 26, 2020

If liz is confiding in another adult, isn’t that a good thing? It means that her world is expanding beyond her family and she’s learning to rely on other people than her immediate family for advice and support.

Oh, how is confiding in a friend different from confiding in a family member?

Because, Elly, parents tend to come across as judgmental. The last thing Elizabeth wants or needs right now is someone who will only lecture her or give her unsolicited pat advice instead of just LISTENING and letting her sort things out for herself.

That difficult time when you have to accept that you are not everything your child ever needs.

Yep, Elly, according to yourself, you should be calling your mother and confide in her. I imagine she will bring up the times you confided in someone else.

The main problem with confiding in your close relatives is that anything you say can and will be taken down and used against you

One reason to confide outside one’s circle is so that the process of processing doesn’t affect the result.

ohhhhhhhhhhhh, so they DID do this in-strip. I noticed this mentioned in a “Behind The Scenes” book, but didn’t realize it made the comic itself. I dig Anne’s use of irony here.

Honestly, it’s not hard to believe Elizabeth would do this- Elly is virtually hysterical all the time, a big nag, and tends to be overly-pushy or intrusive into the lives of others. And kids tend to fear the criticisms of their parents, so another mature adult seems like a good choice by contrast. Plus, you only see the teacher occasionally- not every day.

Let’s face it, going to someone outside the family is a lot easier.

True ‘dat.

The reason Liz confides in her teacher is because Elly would just open her big mouth to scold, criticize, and judge her. I speak from personal experience.

Maybe Ellie is who Elizabeth needs to talk about?

That darn petard just keeps getting hoisted.

Maybe because if you talk about your problems to your parents they will be TOO helpful and try to solve your problems for you. Non family normally just listen and maybe give advice.

What I don’t understand is why she told her mom in the first place. When you talk to someone else about a problem, you don’t go blabbing about it at home. And if you talk to a teacher, for example, be very careful with that word “depressed”. It can get you in more trouble than you can possibly dig your way out of. (this is coming from a mental health professional).

It may have been three possibilities:

1.) The teacher pulled Elizabeth aside, so she opened up at a time when Elly was not present.

2.) Elly has had a reputation for getting angry and huffy over every little thing. She is not the most approachable parent.

3.) Elly grew up in the 1950s, which was the most prosperous time in North American history. She is bitter that she and John are struggling to make ends meet and are in relative poverty to her parents. She has projected some of that bitterness onto the children.

not

No it’s not.

“Mom, don’t freak, but, my boyfriend and I have been dating for nearly 2 weeks and I want to go see a gynecologist, I want a Rx for birth control pills.”

Just made another one…

Just be there. They’ll come around.

Keep in mind when Brian Enjo told his mother about the summer camp incident, he only told his mother what she would have wanted to hear. He blamed the whole shower spying incident on Michael while omitting the fact he himself was a participant. As a result, he became known as “Lyin’ Brian”.

What it is. Is that you need someone to listen to you without criticizing or lecturing you, because what you think or feel, they think is wrong. Just listen.

I assume that Elizabeth would not want to talk to her family or mother about problems that involve them? I’m guessing that one problem may be that she’s no longer the baby of the family with April here, and she would not want to talk to her mom about that subject!

The thing is, Liz DID confide in Elly! She said “I have a problem and I’m working with another adult. This is my exact problem, and this is what the other adult said.” That’s actually a big thing to confide in your parent and shows a level of trust and safety in Elly, a sense of security, in addition to being in a supportive and nurturing education environment with a compassionate teacher.

The last panel has a lesson to all. We confide our concerns in others to overcome my fears and be comfortable that there is somebody to listen.

Elly should be thankful Liz his going to one of her teachers, not one of her teenage friends with their infinite wisdom!