Frazz by Jef Mallett for January 17, 2021

Cats don’t do haikus. They do yoga.

Well, all the best limericks are dirty…

A limerick packs rhymes anatomical

Into verses quite economical

But the good ones I’ve seen

So seldom are clean

And the clean ones so seldom are comical!

Go visit “Rose is a Rose” comic. They have Peekaboo the cat, who sometimes becomes Maharishi Peekaboo, doing Yoga with Rose. Cats have the best Yoga moves.

The subject matter is fine. Making it a haiku is not.

could be worse, I had a classmate who wrote a poem about getting dressed in the mornings and giving underwear on the floor a sniff to see if it was used or fresh from the laundry but just not put away yet. Mind you, it was a funny poem.

Or combine them into a Hairimeraku:

Name of Sadie,

Cherry pit

Wants to spit

Somewhere shady.

See that girl there

Climbing the stair.

She should know,

Crowd below…

Underwear.

Question not the cat

For I am always right

And I know where you sleep

I write prose but not

Poetry. Am I a pro,

But not a poet?

It would be cool if GoComics added all your recent comic likes.

Upchucking haiku

Results in the teacher’s wrath.

It’s a desperate scene.

Jef Mallett’s Blog Posts

Frazz18 hrs · Is it just me, or has haiku kind of become the limerick of the pretentious?

And is it just me, or does everybody occasionally blurt out things like that when they know full well all sorts of their haiku-writing friends and readers, pretentious and otherwise, would be well within their rights to feel a little bit insulted? I suppose it’s my job to blurt things out, but it’s also certain sales representatives’ jobs to sell me crap I don’t need or shouldn’t have, and that doesn’t seem to make it any better, and now I’ve offended friends and readers who are sales reps.

Does it mitigate

the situation any

if I, too, haiku?

No? OK, then:

I certainly never intend

to mock or insult or offend

but I sometimes abuse

my license to muse

(Now to merge “my” and “head” and “rear end”)

Martian Haiku:

“Red sand between my toes,

Summer vacation in outer space"

-Robin Williams

I hate haikus. Mostly because I can’t write one to save my life.