B.C. by Mastroianni and Hart for January 11, 2021

“I am Groot! Let’s party!”

Didn’t those include Annette and Fabian?

A bit unsettling that the voice is making him walk into the ocean.

The other one was Gidget, (girl Midget).

Don’t listen to him. He’s just trying to palm off something.

DUCK and RUN!

There’s a Sniper hidden in the top of that palm tree!! ;)

One day they’ll return…

You are not alone. A great many people are having the same problem.

Day 367 of the lockdown.

Those voices in my head continue to have conversations with my household appliances.

According to the microwave things aren’t going well even though he’s usually cooking something up. The griddle is beginning to waffle and the panini maker thinks it’s a matter of time before we’re all toast. I can’t trust the washing machine since she puts a different spin on things. The refrigerator is acting cold and distant but the iron is straightening things out: the situation isn’t that pressing. I considered talking to the wall, but it was plastered and my roof came down with a case of shingles

The vacuum cleaner was unsympathetic and told me to suck it up, but the fan was encouraging telling me that this will eventually blow over. The toilet looked flushed and the doorknob told me to get a grip. The front door became unhinged and the curtains told me to pull myself together.

The burnt-out lightbulb wasn’t illuminating and my dull knife just wouldn’t cut it. My wide-screen TV didn’t have the big picture and I couldn’t count on my broken calculator. Even though the clock had time on its hands, it had second thoughts especially about the minute details; hour conversation was limited. My record player just went around in circles and I could not get a rise out of the yeast in the kitchen. The tortilla was flat but the coffee maker did perk me up.

The lawn mower was too high on grass to be of any use and the rototiller couldn’t turn anything up. However, the hammer was able to nail things down that was plane to see. I had a conversation with my drill, but it was boring.

I guess I’ll have to screw up the courage to consult the wine bottle.

Never before have I found amusement in anyone’s bragging about having a huge vocabulary. Thank you for a pleasantly novel experience!

I remember those, but upon reflection, I have never seen our beaches so clean.

There are a few brainless beach bums who never forgot parties of any kind. (Uh, what pandemic?? Duhh)

Not sure what isn’t real here – maybe that the palm tree isn’t wearing a mask?

Distance makes the heart grow fonder…

Remember the submarine races at the desert river?

You mean like Beach Blanket Bingo, the pornhub edition?

In 1987 Annette & Frankie did “Back to the Beach”a spoof of their own movies. Bob Denver had a cameo as a bartender on the beach.who got mad when a customer called him Little Buddy.