Ripley's Believe It or Not by Ripley’s Believe It or Not! for February 12, 2021

Another true story:

My wife’s company used to send her out of state occasionally. The first time this happened, early on in our relationship, I decided to send flowers to her place of work. So I went to a florist shop. After choosing the display I wanted to send, I went to the cashier to pay and and give the address where they should be sent. “How do you want the card signed?” she asked.

Thinking it would keep a bit of spice in the nascent relationship, I said, “Just leave it blank.”

She got angry at that; her jaw tightened. “Sir,” she intoned, “We do NOT send out flowers without some sort of signature; not from THIS shop. I need at least your first name. WHAT IS YOUR NAME?”

Well, I could see I was defeated on that issue, so I said, “OK – my name is Anon.” (I made it rhyme with “cannon.”)

“Anon?” she repeated. “I’ve never heard of that name. How do you spell it?”

“A, N, O, N,” I told her. She gave me a slight nod of superiority, that I couldn’t beat HER, and wrote it down.

My wife still has the card.

Singleton has some really incredible artwork, actually. These two series are probably my favourites:

http://andysingleton.co.uk/emotional-states

http://andysingleton.co.uk/mini-nebula-series

And of course:

http://andysingleton.co.uk/paper-dragon

Holy chitin, Batman!

Was it Monsieur Matisse himself who noticed his masterpiece was upside-down and told the museum curator(s) that mistake?

So, some guy made a really sheety dragon?

Holy sparkling guano, Batman!

Upside down?? Who can tell the difference??? They’re all wrong. It’s sideways!!

You could say he took origami to a whole new, unimaginable level.

Just what we all need, sparking guana.

Bat poop Sparkles? Bat Poop Sparkles! Here, I’ve been telling everybody it was Unicorn Poop and Fairy Dust!

Sparkling Bat Poop. Film at 11.

You could hang that Matisse in any direction and not make a difference. Did the framer do it right in the first place? We’ll never know.

Is this why vampires in Twilight Sparkle?

Sparkling poop below is how I could tell bats had moved into the bat house I made for them. They are excellent, natural insect controllers.

Bowel Bling.

The “Le Bateau” incident just means that it was a “Le POS”. And on that topic, bat poop is called guano.

I don’t care if it sparkles, I’m guano leave it alone.

Happy Birthday, Abe.

I have a funny true story from years ago. I walked into my 15-year-old son’s room, and noticed a bottle on the shelf; the label said “Love Oil”. WHAT!! He’s only 15!! I picked up the bottle, and realized I’d only seen part of the label. It actually said “Glove Oil”. It was for his baseball mitt, lol.

The epic “Caca At the Bat” comes to mind.

Take care, may Jovian cricket champion M&^$%!@Glumzord be with you, and gesundheit.

It didn’t matter which way Mr. Matoosse paper cut was hung. It didn’t look like anything either way…

Second Law of Art, Elantu’s Law ‘If the artist has to explain what it means, then it’s not art.’

“It’s not art, it’s a failure. Instead of universal symbolism or universal language, it’s gibberish. Or a con job!”

Andy has way too much time on his hands.

And that is why, I feel, that modern art is all about a person who has a dynamic personality and a wealthy sponsor.

After a biker got a mouthful of butterflies he sh*t in Technicolor for a week.

Who needs a paper tiger when…?

Try hanging it sideways. Now, everybody’s happy.

Which version of the Matisse did Ripley’s Believe It or Not show today? The correct orientation or the upside down orientation?

I’m sure bat poop doesn’t smell like sparkles.

Hmmm, makes you think about those vampires that sparkle in the Twilight stories…

Bats might be able to get along with unicorns, together they can make sparkled rainbows