That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for August 30, 2021

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    BE THIS GUY  about 3 years ago

    Pick the right marble, take a shot. Grandma was wasted before lunch.

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    rmremail  about 3 years ago

    Dang it. That was my glasses case! Now where did I put my dentures?

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    Solstice*1947  about 3 years ago

    Every evening Claire sits in her chair / playing marble-on-board solitaire. / From her manner you’d swear / that she isn’t “all there,” / but do not for this woman despair. /// There are things of which you’re unaware. / Like, her day-job’s translating Voltaire. / When her game ends she’ll pair / with her room-mate, Pierre, / to continue their torrid affair.

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    Say What Now‽ Premium Member about 3 years ago

    The moment when Gramma ate the marbles and played with the biscuit.

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    Solstice*1947  about 3 years ago

    Agatha was devastated to learn that her prized possession, a necklace of large varicolored pearls, had finally been appraised as sourballs.

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    ronaldspence  about 3 years ago

    I don’t think we can call it Chinese Checkers anymore, I think it is called “Marcheck-19 ” now…

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    Solstice*1947  about 3 years ago

    She had prepared a meal of glazed pearl onions, poured herself some wine, and was fairly certain that the missing fork and knife were causing that pain in her hips.

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    Solstice*1947  about 3 years ago

    When there’s no one around her to chatter, / Aggie stares at glass balls on a platter. / At nay-sayers she’ll gloat / when she gets them to float / just by thinking it. Mind-over-matter.

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    Call me Ishmael  about 3 years ago
    “Helen’s Pupils“

    Suddenly, strangely, Helen found the plate with the preserved eyeballs of her several poisoned lovers quite discomfiting. It was as though they were looking back at her…well..accusingly. Perhaps it was it last time to stop playing with them..Having fed them their dinners fateful/ Helen gathered their sad eyes by the plateful/ so they’d never be lonely/ for their sweet “one and only“/Helen thought that they ought to be grateful.

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    pcolli  about 3 years ago

    Her collection of glazed kidney stones.

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    Buzzworld  about 3 years ago

    15,000 oysters later Helen finally found enough pearls to make a necklace.

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    Egrayjames  about 3 years ago

    Absolutely no one recognizes Dolly Parton without her makeup on.

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    Pocosdad  about 3 years ago

    By the time Helen finished taking her morning meds, it was time to start taking her lunchtime ones.

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    Reader  about 3 years ago

    She may be losing her marbles, but she’s still on her rocker.

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    PO' DAWG  about 3 years ago

    Waiting for her Match.Com date to show up, hoping she didn’t get cat fished.

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    PoodleGroomer  about 3 years ago

    She had spent her life freely handing out her pearls of wisdom, but now this is all she has left.

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    Another Take  about 3 years ago

    Poison Pill Roulette was no longer a thrill after Helen’s friend “found” the only deadly pill weeks ago. Still, Helen played on.

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    Another Take  about 3 years ago

    _Nothin’ could be finer, than a pill that stopped angina, in the mor-or-ning!

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    Another Take  about 3 years ago

    Helen believed that a plate of Tom Cat Oysters every day kept her young and vital. (Not to mention keeping the stray cat population under control)

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    KEA  about 3 years ago

    In ‘Rest You Merry’ by Charlotte MacLeod, a lost marble leads to solving a murder. (one of my favorite books, and a holiday tradition)

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    The Wolf In Your Midst  about 3 years ago

    Build-A-Bear Workshop’s less-successful offshoot: Build-Your-Dentures.

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    Calvins Brother  about 3 years ago

    Jacks mother couldn’t believe he traded the cow for these.

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    prrdh  about 3 years ago

    Mrs. Queeg decided to give her favorite steelies to her son Philip to celebrate his assignment to command the U.S.S. Caine.

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    Plods with ...™  about 3 years ago

    When she loses them all, she can be a sales rep.

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    anomaly  about 3 years ago

    “These ballbearings should be enough ammo for my slingshot when those pesky kids get on my lawn again.”

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    mabrndt Premium Member about 3 years ago

    Solitaire

    https://artuk.org/discover/artworks/solitaire-46111 

    has info about this roughly jumbo envelope size painting, inscribed with 

    C.SPENCELAYH 

    1952 

    at the lower right.

     

    Again, a larger strip image is shown by (⌘- or Ctrl-) clicking the image at 

    http://thatispriceless.blogspot.com/2021/08/masterpiece-2781.html 

    So far, 3 works by this artist have been used here. 

    https://www.gocomics.com/that-is-priceless/2021/08/27?comments=visible 

    has the prior, and my 

    http://thatispriceless.blogspot.com/2021/08/masterpiece-2778.html 

    comment has the artist info that I used to point to here. Again, due to copyright issues (the artist died in 1958 and the painting’s date is after 1926), I can’t use Wikimedia Commons for this painting.

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    sparklite  about 3 years ago

    “Paint-by-number with marbles isn’t as much fun as using actual paint, but at least it’s free.”

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    d1234dick Premium Member about 3 years ago

    Bhula spends her days no, counting her different brands of opiates, which Medicare sends her each week, she’s lucky that supply exceeds demand.

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    Solstice*1947  about 3 years ago

    No one would ever suspect that Tess was a master criminal, the head of the international cartel which controls the smuggling and sale of turtle eggs.

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    Running Buffalo Premium Member about 3 years ago

    I wish that guy with the donkey and sleigh will hurry up and bring my fish for dinner. Surely he is smart enough not to use the cart.

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    Helen Ferrieux  about 3 years ago

    So glad to be remembered by so many of you !

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    Solstice*1947  about 3 years ago

    The painter, Charles Spencelayh, grew tired of merely immortalizing moments of loneliness and depression among the elderly. He decided to do something to improve the situation. He arranged for the solitaire woman and the barometer man to meet.

    They hated each other, and blamed him for getting their hopes up. Charles vowed never again to get involved in the lives of his models. And that is why that farm couple and their donkey froze to death.

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    Durak Premium Member about 3 years ago

    “It was the strawberries.”

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