Nancy by Olivia Jaimes for September 25, 2021

Just use periods.

Or no punctuation at all

I think this is a really good example of

Maybe she should end her emails with an appropriate vintage cartoon, like from the strip about the little girl and her bald friend. Wish I could remember the girl’s name!

My personal modus operandi is just to use a style so overly formal that it creates a comical effect. Like “At what point will the food be in a state to be transported my-mouthwards?”

Peppy?

You could always end your emails with a catchphrase. Like… uhhh… ummm… “And that’s all I have to say—”… Wait, hold on… Hold on… Hold on…

Look, catchphrases are hard, ok? Now get off my back with your flack, Jack.

The use of incontinent ellipses reminds me too much of the pathetic “poetry” I read in The Highway Evangelist (found a copy at a truck stop in the 70s). Of course the subjects were cloying tearjerk drivel, the rhymes were awful, and the writer(s) had no notion of a thing called “meter,” but the ellipses were what stood out for me, as though the writers were gasping out these little lines in Shatner-like cadences, four to the verse.

: )

It has to do with the same phenomenon that resulted (back in the days of letterpress) in the banning from comic books of the word “flick”….