Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for December 10, 2021

Criminals with accounting credentials

Till he is an entity – all is well.

Old accountant joke

And old business owner decides he needs some help so he interviews three people

The first is a mathematician. The old man asks him " How much is 2 plus 2 "

The mathematician takes a piece of paper and a pencil and works furiously for an hour then proudly proclaims " Four "

Next in is an engineer. Again the old man asks " How much is 2 plus 2 "

The engineer thinks for a couple of minutes then replies " Four, within a specified safety margin "

Last in is an accountant. Again the old man asks " How much is 2 plus 2 "

The accountant goes to the window and looks around and closes the drapes. Then he goes to the door and looks up and down the hall and closes the door. He comes back and whispers to the old man " How much would you like it to be ? "

That accountant just needs to go to the Postmaster General (DeJoy) appointed by the previous Prez. He’d likely be willing to stop delivering mail to Santa Claus. In so doing, he’d be taking out the reason the court legally acknowledged his existence in Miracle on 34th Street.

That’s why he has the Santa “clause” in his contract. (Stolen from a movie, I know.)

Isn’t Santa a 501 ( c ) 3 operation?

You have to allow for subordinate clauses.

Groan

Evidently a fairly common ploy among the 1%.

So, that’s Trump’s secret?

“Yes, (in) Virginia …”

it is the accounting for Santa’s little gifts that has Trump in trouble in New York city and the state of New York. Al Capone went to jail just for that and might be Don the Con’s fate. as well. Shall we declare a national holiday for what ever it takes to get the scumbag, Trump not Santa, into jail?

Questions must be asked about Santa’s operation. No clear income, no labor costs, no purchasing of materials but plenty of presents generated and delivered. How?

Be prepared to have your bank accounts monitored, Santa.

It appears that this Santa subject is well-known by many of the readers and you all are not afraid to show off your special knowledge about him! I myself have had many experiences with him but will not bore you all with tales tonite.. I will save them for later when we get closer to The. Big. Night.

Scene from the movie “Miracle on Wall Street”.

He lives at the North pole. He is not living in any country and is a citizen of no country. He needs pay no taxes. Now, fines for illegally crossing national borders; and I doubt he files a flight plan.

And the Award for Best Play on Words go’s to…

A paid advertisement? Jack L. Burgess, CPA – Timberlake NC Tax Preparer

Trombone “Waa waa waaaaa”

IIRC there was a character in The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy books who was dead for tax purposes.

Nicholas Schludwiller, D.B.A. Santa Claus.

Why does Santa care? He ain’t an American citizen!

Must be Trump’s accountant…

My understanding is that Santa Claus has zero income. It’s part of the magic of being a poor philanthropist. :)

Ha! A direct steal from my 2020 short story, “restraint of trade” published in Alpha One, a Christian anthology. And my story had the genesis of how St, Nicholas of Myra got on his way to the Santa we know today.

Since he only works 1 day a year and makes no money, he wouldn’t qualify for unemployment.

He’s spending a year as a fable for tax reasons.

Santa is a cosmopolitan and is a member of no country, so no taxes paid to anyone. He is also not entirely human either.

His location is a secret, somewhere in Antarctica and under a camouflage shield in the No-Fly area of that continent. His satellite factories are in the Alps, Shan mountains and Andes.

Also, such molecular construction factories in Africa including the Atlas, Drakensberg, Rwenzori and with the Semien and Murrah mountains as industrial sites within the heart of the ranges so as to not upset the ecology and there is no waste products from his factories. These are carbon negative since carbon from CO2 is used in building the toys.

Hotblack Desiato once spent a year dead for tax purposes.

If your fictitious, you can deduct yourself from reality.

Santa does have several Billion “Dependents” who get all their Christmas loot from him.

“Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus — and he’s incorporated in Delaware for tax purposes.”