Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for December 08, 2021

Utility companies have regulatory commissions; the powers of the universe don’t.

He/She can.

If you like, the power company rule can be changed.

How much postage is it going to cost that letter?

Because ethics are for mortals.

Because the “Powers That Be In The Universe” rely on unnatural misinformation while the power company uses natural resources.

The power company DOES “give notice” of expected outages. But they sure don’t tell me in advance of UNexpected outages… and those often last longer, too!

Shouldn’t that be “Powers that are in the Universe”?

The Powers that Be or not to Be.

Because electricity is more important.

Rat, do you really want a warning?

Profound is not the word.

Sometimes the Powers That Be do send us warnings that we should take better care of our health. We don’t always listen.

Sometimes you get a warning, and if you do not heed it, your chances of sticking around might be lessened !

In a way, the power company has the “power of darkness”…how’s that for profundity, Rat? Now, don’t get profane!

In a way, the power company has the “power of darkness”…how’s that for profundity, Rat? Now, no need to use profanity! :D

Because the universe runs on cause and effect. We cannot process all the causes to determine all the effects.

Not sure I’d want a warning letter. I would have to start putting my affairs in order and that would kill me or I would party like its 1999 and that would kill me.

Power company warns you before that? You must be living in a privileged territory.

Because there are no conscious powers in the universe outside of the neural brains of organic creatures.

The power company works for you. They warn you when you haven’t paid, because they want your money.

according to the contract, we had to give three days notice before dying……

They don’t even warn you now, Mr Rat.

How can I sign up for Rat’s power company???

Life’s a Rat, then you die.

Well, do rats do have three or five years to live, so you could be gone any day now.

Is that Austin Powers?

They report to different authorities with different standards of operation.

You got your final notice that you were going to be disconnected right after your birth. You are just waiting for actual turn off.

Good point, Rat!

What do you want rat? A voice coming out of the heavens saying: " This is your 2 Minute Warning … Get your sh*t together! "?

People get warnings all the time, they chose to ignore them.

RAT is trying to justify his reasoning….neva gonna happen…

Well, the powers that be many times knock out my power without warning.

You never paid your powers that be in the universe bill, so no notice when they turn it off……

Stuart and Raj from Big Bang Theory: Raj: “So have you contacted the power company about not having power at your house?” Stuart: “Yes, many times.” Raj: “And what do they say?” Stuart: “Pay your power bill!”

funny AND makes me think

So… is death the equivalent of having no power?

Because the power company is a regulated public utility. What you want to lose first, Rat, cat videos or all the power in your house?

it’s the difference between beaurocracy and an all powerful tyrant

The power company is profound. The Powers That Be in the Universe are prolost.

Genealogist joke:

I found out that my great-grandfather not only knew when he was going to die, he knew how.

Really?? How in the world could he know that?

A judge told him.

Or, like my wife and I, you could experience HOSPICE.

If Rat wants to appear profound, he better come up with a lot better analogy than that.

Hmmm. I bought a generator for the house just because the power company doesn’t warn me …

Dear Rat,If I told you, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me," would you believe me? You have your notice.Sincerely,Jesus

The power company does give you warning of an outage. They turn your electricity off for ten minutes as a ten minute warning.

Possums.Not “opossums”, proper arboreal Australian possums who hate being on the ground. They love using powerlines to get about.And so, just as the power company has no control over possums, sometimes the powers-that-be just kill off the odd random rat without notice…

Rat, you are not so much profound as profane.

As usual, Rat gives himself too much credit….

“The powers that be” is an early 17th century expression meaning the human authorities.