That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for January 12, 2022

Welcome home! I see you brought both the wife and mistress!

/// After Victory, home is Sir Knight,

reuniting with fam’ly held tight.

Wife and children crowd round,

(midst the snarls of his hound).

He can’t wait to get back to the fight.

/// For his doddering father gives greeting

dressed in mother’s best clothes for the meeting.

And his youngest sons (two),

from a balcony’s view,

are the proof that his wife has been cheating.

All the women swoon when you use Axe spray. The dog; not so much.

The other members of the quartet were amazed at the sonority of the blast that emanated from within Sir Sagamore’s armor! It seemed the trumpet of doom had been sounded!

The invitation specifically said no kids, I never thought to ban dogs too! These guests are insufferable!

What a pity Dickens never lived long enough to name a character Hermogenes. But Spike Milligan did:There was a man named Hermogenes PhniggsWho lived in Kilburn in terrible digs.He changed his name to Eric FruitAnd now the damn’ thing won’t rhyme.

Never heard of Wordless before. Just tried it.

thanks for bringing the babes! you can go back to war now…

“Come all without, come all within. You’ll not see nothing like the Mighty Quinn”

Is this gonna be a mock Michael Jackson “dangle the baby over the balcony” moment?! (Yikes!)

It reminds me a bit of the old Kliban cartoon – “Out of the way swine! A cartoonist is coming.”

“Welcome home my son. What have you brought us?”

“Worst case of hemorrhoids and armor rash ever.”

Where’s the camera? Who was supposed to hire a wedding photographer?

Look, look! Our lord has returned from the crusades! He is our master, and we pay him our taxes. And he can’t be bothered to actually stay home & govern.

It’s the same scene every time Sir Roderick gets his pension cheque.

We will have a great feast with boar AND venison, and we’ll drink wine until we’re drunk – Deus Vult.

The Sudoku collapsed when he realized that box was an 8.

Hermogenes?

Hang on, Minister. I specifically said “No pets and no children” at this wedding! So we’re just going to stand here and wait until the undesirables are removed!

Once we played Tic-Tac-Toe — so I’ve heard — / Or D&D (if you’re a nerd) / But I really must say / Coming down to today / Now that Wordle’s come out, well, my word!

May Covid avoid you and yours my friends.

As for those two ladies at the top of the steps: Didn’t their mom ever tell them to never stand under a portcullis? Most accidents happen in the home.

Congratulations on marrying my 3rd and last daughter, I throw in this lovely dog so that the four of you will be happy and I shall be oh so much richer!

Or when yours is the featured comment on That Is Priceless.

I had never heard of Wordle, so I checked it out. Literally got the word on my second guess! (It was mostly luck, of course, but still.)

He stands stolid as he is greeted by his brides family…delaying the honeymoon.

(Woman in black on stairs) “It was a 12 letter word for poodle that did it.”

Home after Victory: 

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Philip_Hermogenes_Calderon_-_Home_after_Victory.jpg 

has info and links that point to more info about this huge painting.

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (⌘- or Ctrl-) clicking the image at 

http://thatispriceless.blogspot.com/2022/01/masterpiece-2870.html 

I have added a comment there (awaiting Mr. Melcher’s approval) pointing to the artist info I used to point to here. So far, 4 works by this artist have been used here. 

https://www.gocomics.com/that-is-priceless/2019/04/23?comments=visible 

has the prior (the artist info URLs in my comment there is pointed to by the here links in my blog comment).

King Charles, with wife and daughter is confronted by a old college friend who he had sex with in school, every body did it then.

deranged woman about to throw baby off balcony.

I’ve just learned why ISH is not with us today: He is in hospital for quadruple bypass surgery tomorrow We (Blatherskite, Bethrmz & I) Are offering our prayers and hopes for his return to these pages as Ish (our brother Joe) is to us irreplaceable. We hope you will join us in our wishes for his recovery as I could not begin to fill his limerick-crafting shoes-B.O.I.

Welcome home! While you were away; I removed everything from the castle, and replaced it with an exact duplicate!

That feeling when you’re the “Featured comment” on Priceless…