That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for February 17, 2022

My original post in 2017:

The date was not going as well as Gertrude anticipated.

“Are we supposed to eat the centerpiece?”

Now that we’ve solved all of America’s problems, lets tackle Ukraine.

“I guess I could see your point…if your hat wasn’t covering it up!”

Rose and Lucy had been giving each other the silent treatment for three years now.

Are you certain this is the right table? I don’t think I’ve seen our waiter since we sat down. Or any waiter.

/// We were having Late Afternoon Tea,

just my sister Camelia and me.

Seated outdoors among

floral blooms, she was stung,

when her bonnet attracted a bee.

/// At “The Magic Hour” bathed in gold beams,

her great beauty seemed airy, like dreams.

Then the sting caused such pain

to her scalp and her brain,

that she shattered my vase with her screams.

Don’t let it stress you, Snow White dear, they may be taking quite a while developing those pictures you took with your Brownie, but you may be assured: someday your prints will come!

“Of course I wear a hat to receive guests in my own home, dear. I can’t sport those charming freckles that you wear with such panache.”

With so many in your garden, Why did you have to kill these?

What is a “downton” anyway?

Ohhhhh!!! No she di-int!!!

4:00 Tea-se

fannie was a regular at bonnets Я us…

“Damn, dog ! White be-yotces be gettin’ pretty good at this sh*t!”

…bless your heart.

You’re right Mary Poppins, your special tea leaves do put the high in high tea!

“Are we done here, I’m sitting in a puddle of my own sweat.”

“I’m not sure, but who is that singing over at the grandstand? Was he one of the Everly Brothers?”

Good news! You can find them on Hulu.

You didn’t miss anything

Gertrude, I asked you here today to let you know that starting tomorrow I am going goth.

Darling, sit up straight, elbows off the table, and where is your hat? Honestly, one might think you were born of the middle class…..or worse!

Alright, we might have to wear these silly dresses. But, I’m not putting on a stupid hat!

Cripes! We’re both 21, yet they still won’t let us sit indoors at the adult table!

The sign did say ‘No Mask, No Vax, No Service’.

Men passing by were often turned on until they realized that the leg they saw through the sheer table cloth belonged to the table.

And when we stand up, they can see through our dresses too.

For years after finishing this painting, Harris obsessed over one detail: Did he put enough flowers in it?

Bea, what are you doing in my bonnet?

“Such a lovely hat, dear. Do you have a pot of soil underneath it, or do the roots grow through your skull?”

3 seasons is one heavy bit**.

Late Afternoon Tea: 

https://rehs.com/eng/default-image-page/?fl_builder&image_no=3533 

has info and links that point to more info about this roughly jumbo envelope size painting. Copyright issues keep it from being uploaded to Wikimedia Commons.

Again, a slightly larger strip image is shown by (Ctrl- or right-) clicking the image at 

https://thatispricelessblog.com/2022/02/masterpiece-1644 

and using the dropdown menu. I have added a comment there pointing to the artist info I used to point to here. First work by this artist used here (2 times total, including this Throwback Thursday repeat). 

https://www.gocomics.com/that-is-priceless/2017/02/17?comments=visible 

has the first time this was used here (the artist info URLs are pointed to by the here links in my blog entry comment).

P.S. After posting yesterday’s comment, I made several changes to the the Wikimedia Commons file pointed to there.

I love your hat, oh I sitting here commando!

Though the tablecloth matches her dress//and the sandwiches are watercress//it’s just not proper tea//with no hat, can’t you see?//Just an untimely visit from Bess//

Laura had planned an afternoon in//She’d some wool she needed to spin//But when Bess rang the bell//Laura thought, What the hell?//She may have some good news of kin//

Then the too rosy blush on her face//Telegraphed the news of her case//For beneath her chemise//A frightful disease//Has occupied her inner space//

Asked Bess, “Has Roger been here?//I hope not, for your sake, my dear//For he carries along//Something lodged in his schlong,//And it’s hard to get rid of, I fear.”//

Said Laura, “I haven’t a care!//With me, that jerk got nowhere.//On the grapevine, he’s said//To be well-hung, but dead//From the neck up, so there.”//

Now the cousins are deep in parlay//Wondering how this bad card can be played//And as Bess, deep in thought//Reviews how she’s been caught//She asks, “Where is your pistol displayed?”//

♫ Just tea for two and two for tea, just me for you and you for me alone. ♫ (Songwriters: Irving Caesar / Vincent Youmans)

Well, yo mamma’s so fat, she was floatin’ in the ocean and Spain claimed her as the new world.

My dear, Will you be mother? You could easily pass for my mother..

I am so sorry that the third didn’t show up. Shall we try for the menage a trois next week?