Close to Home by John McPherson for April 10, 2022

How they cancelled people before the internet!

How about Anniversary’s.

She is now planning to have at least one birthday per month.

She may be right. He may not survive until her next one.

She always has a stock answer to these problems.

I’d hate to see what she does when he forgets to put the Toilet Seat down.

How can I remember your birthday when you never look a day older?

He did not realize what she was asking for when she said that she wanted to buy some stocks.

Some of the other wives want to have a stake in this. They would like to use it, too – they are hoping to get some shares.

By the way she phrased that, it would seem she has more than one birthday per year.

public humiliation can do that to ya.

How many birthdays does she have in one year?

Stocks (feet) and pillory (head & wrists)! That would be very uncomfortable. Usually it was one or the other. Is she going to throw rotten food and dung at him? Maybe shave his head?

Wow, when she said she was buying stocks and bonds he totally misunderstood.

Shouldn’t people be throwing things at him, too?

Calendar alerts brah. Calendar alerts!!

Hey Bleeb, are you stuck in there? Someone save him!

He could have at least bought her a vacuum!

If it’s an anniversary he’ll be chained to the wall in the basement!

“Yeah, yeah I definitely won’t be forgetting your birthday anymore…

… ooh, hey, whattayaknow, My sciatica’s gone!”

Time to take stock of your marriage. I’d be outta there (assuming I ever get outta here, of course).

I know that this is a comic strip standard gag, but I can’t imagine forgetting a family member’s birthday or your own anniversary. Do people really do this? I also don’t see the point of buying presents out of the same bank account as the person you’re buying it for: “Here’s something I bought for you with your money.”

I think I would find somewhere else to live.

And we can just imagine the comments if these roles had been reversed. :)

She should have put a pile of balls for passer by’s to throw at him…

Shouldn’t there be a basket with ripe tomatoes next to the sidewalk for passerbys?

No, no it won’t.

Now he’ll be forgetting about her entirely, once he hits the road.

Never quite sure something should be funny when she is abusing her spouse.

I think Bleeb sympathizes with her husband.

How is he going to get his feet out? Let alone get them in. Should be a lock on both the top and bottom and a slit in the bottom to place the feet through.

How did she get him to agree to go in the stock?

Looks uncomfortable…..

She probably expects to have one birthday a month.

I still remember the birthday of the last girl I was in love with.

He will soon take stock of his forgetfulness!

Where’s the box of rotten tomatoes to throw at him?

One of your birthdays? How many do you have?