Broom Hilda by Russell Myers for March 30, 2022

Hammered her expectations

What would a buzzard need from a hardware store, he would hurt himself.

I can remember a strip from the “Dotty Dripple” comics (which were a ripoff of “Blondie”), where Horace Dripple announced to his family that he was going to the drug store.

He was immediately bombarded with requests from his wife and kids, just like here.

Finally, Horace said he was going to the “rug” store—a lie, but it got his family off his back.

BTW, in case you’re wondering, I turn 74 in June—old enough to remember “Dotty Dripple”!!

Might settle for a screwdriver.

If you want to keep your tail feathers, you’ll make a stop for the snacks.

Okay, that’s Broomie’s breakfast order. Now as for lunch…

Rutabaga? That’s one veggie I’ve never tasted.. (ꆤ⍸ꆤ)

How about some duct tape, Broomy?

Well if “I had a hammer, I would hammer in the morning, I would hammer in the evening…”

If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.

Ironically, he’s gonna get a Ditch Witch…

( ͡ ﹏ʖ ͡  )

Maybe he wants to fix a 1500 year old headache.

That tree suddenly has a strange look about it.

Now Gaylord, you know Broomie doesn’t know anything about machinery.

Husband can spend hours at our local hardware store. Visiting with the manager and employees, discussing his current project, checking on any sales items, and sometimes buying something.

You need it for the road kill crabs!

How about I hit you with a hammer if you don’t go to the grocery store for me.

Rutabaga?!?! (I love ‘em, don’t get me wrong, but croissants, ice cream, and RUTABAGA?)

If I had a hammer, I’d be willing to trade it for (most of) those snacks. Not the rutabaga, though. Grandma used to do cooking-stuff with rutabaga, and I never really liked the outcome….