JumpStart by Robb Armstrong for May 16, 2022

Pretty sure Joe is a LEO…

And the zodiac is two stations behind the actual astronomical positions.

Well, since you put it that way…

Does this mean fortune cookies aren’t always right either?

Following up on yesterday’s strip…

I am a Leo. We Leo’s are not superstitious.

Does anybody still believe that stuff? See also I Am The Jam, above.

Every horoscope trope I read tells me my Libra husband shouldn’t be married to this Virgo. Boy they certianly do not look at our lives.

I’m a Gemini.

Yawn…

Few things terrify the human mind as much as not being in control, because things that you’re not in control of can kill you. So the human mind invents systems that it thinks give it some kind of control, or at least foresight into what threats might arise.

Who reads a printed newspaper anymore?

The correct term is “hokum.”

So…the horoscope is okay as long as it’s favorable to you? Alrighty then… (¬‿¬)

Next you’re going to tell me my Magic 8 Ball does not give me sound advice.

According to the place mats at the Chinese restaurant where my husband and I had our first date, we are totally incompatible. I’m an Ox, and the last two sentences of that animal’s description claimed Marry a Snake or a Cock. The Sheep will bring trouble. My husband, a Sheep, had the following lines: You are most compatible with Boars and Rabbits. But never the Ox. After more than thirty years together, we occasionally look at one another and say, “The sheep will bring trouble,” and “Never the ox.” Then we chuckle and go back to just grunting at each other.

I remember there was a sequence in Calvin & Hobbes where he believed horoscopes were true and based his behavior on it with the usual problematic outcome.

Trust me on this. My GA and I have been married for 51 years. You two ARE compatible.

What about the horoscopes of those on Vulcan or Gallifrey? Would they change if an inhabitant of those planets were to venture elsewhere like Romulus or Endor or Yavin or Caladan?

Ah ha. There you go.

I’m a Sagittarius and my wife is a Taurus and we will have been married 48 years in October.