Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for July 20, 2022

No helmet — or no head?

Risky, or risqué?

Potato Head has new vasectomy locating girl cops to pose as copkers to go out into cities and nose out Johns paying for sex.

… no one wears house dresses anymore…

…nor pantyhouse…

…(even ones with lines in the back)…

…anymore…

…yoga pants leggings are another matter…

…these are worn all the time…

…they are the new jeans…

…but wasn’t it, ‘Line in the back, Thursday’ ?…

…With her freehand, she unsnapped her chinstrap …

…makes a great opening sentence of a new chapter…

…or a final one…

…hey, my eyes are up here…

…but she was just another faceless person in the crowd…

…and this is her story…

…with her freehand, she unsnapped her chinstrap…

…Jenny got off the bike…

…and met her fate…

…

…five more dollars for the rest of the story…

…<$:÷× Froglandia Piqua click bate…

She was a puzzle, wrapped in enigma, with a bicycle helmet. I was enjoying a breakfast taco at the corner bodega, in their courtyard café, when she came rolling in on her vintage Schwinn. There was something sketchy about her, but maybe it was her upholstery that kept me from noticing immediately. I’ve always been a friend and supporter of the people, after all. I pulled my fedora down a quarter inch and pretended to be studying the enameled steel picnic table’s surface.

She speaks Woodstock.

Aaaakk!

I remember those chinstraps, not to mention the hose with a seam up the back….trying to keep it straight was frustrating! Some were known to pencil in the seam and go bare! (((((Gasp)))))❗️❗️

Pencil skirts, pointy bras, saddle shoes, middys, lace collars, pins, pearls and poodle skirts!

I actually have a poodle skirt …used it for a costume when we celebrated the Millennium 2000!

Her other hand, of course, was there to support the household.

Robert lived in Vermont, where he ate only the heads off chocolate bunnies…

…the Marie Antoinette paper doll gave young children a flavor for the finality of decapitation…

If they cannot afford gas, let them drive Tesla’s.

What did the expensive hand do?

Farts-humper is Norwegian for speed bump.

Her not-so-slow hand …?

Hand quicker than eye methinks…..

… so she could fit the whole thing in her mouth.

After a rousting bout of activity on a warm day, it feels great to unsnap the chinstrap and take off the head gear. Sometimes the simple pleasures in life are immeasurably pleasing. Like that Tssshhhh of opening a beer can on a hot day, and the first sip. The second and third sip ain’t too bad either. The first hot shower after a long camping trip. Putting on fresh socks. The intoxicating petrichor of the first rain after a long hot summer.

—And her chin fell off!

That happens with de-fleshed skulls; the chin is articulated but not attached. Mummies need to have their chins bound to their crania.

But I do like a Free Hand. Having to pay for them is so demeaning….

Both of my hands are very expensive. Nothing is free on my body.