That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for September 22, 2022

My original comment in 2015:

Only place she can read “50 Shades of Grey” without her husband finding out.

Oh, there’s a rake involved, but that little garden tool aint it.

She is waiting for somebody to come lead her down the primrose path

Eunice, reading Tom Sawyer and wondering if the old “Paint the fence trick” would work on trimming hedges?

Emily was about to find out it is not a good idea to wear high heels in a garden.

Ikea guide on building a secret garden.

/// Prudence strolled down her garden’s north edge,

on the path by a tall border hedge,

too engrossed in her reading

to observe what needs weeding,

for the author had made her a pledge.

/// Love notes come with a single red rose,

but The Letter was not one of those.

The pledge wasn’t to woo her;

this lout promised to sue her.

He blamed Pru for his new broken nose.

/// He’d brought roses last week. They were fake.

Tried to sell them to Pru. First mistake!

She’d refused his “great deal.”

(Pru liked her flowers real.)

And that’s when the fool stepped on her rake.

Dear neighbor,I never promised you a rose garden.

*And when all else fails….get your husband to do it!!!

“I really hate these. Roses ARE red but violets AREN’T actually blue.”

SNORT! Thank you Steve!

Ah! Pull, not push!

Letter from IRS about nonpayment of taxes for 8 years.

Circumstantial evidence that Oliver Mellors was not illiterate.

Someone has been in her garden, picked a rose, and left her a note……but Alice still doesn’t realize she now has a stalker.

She isn’t the type to toil/

In the hot sun, tilling the soil/

She is far too refined/

And is rather inclined/

On the couch, with a book, to “uncoil”../

Hortense was beginning to suspect that her plant catalog left out a few important things describing that “wonderfully fast-growing Oriental plant, Kudzu.” She thought it would be a delightful complement amongst her moss roses and pink creeping phlox. But it seems to her to have gotten out of control. Now where is the gardening shed? Heavens, where is the house?

Eliza is trying to read the map that will her get her out of this hedge maze already.

Stretch it out. Stretching or warming up before you begin is an important step helping prevent back pain when raking leaves. …Keep proper form. …Lift properly. …Use correct sized rakes. …Wear the right stuff. Wide brimmed hats. Boots. Long dress for ladies. Slacks, long sleeve shirt and waistcoat for men. … Take a break. …Don’t overdo it. … DO NOT lay rake on the grass points up

Julianna was so engrossed in reading “The Secret Garden” that she walked right past the entrance to her own garden.

Hello. We’ve been trying to reach you about your Extended Car Warranty.

the safety warnings probably run for at least 3 pages

The prose ancestor of the unboxing video. Or just occupying herself while waiting for an eligible suitor to pick up the handkerchief she dropped two hours ago.

Put the money under the rake or you’ll never see Whiskers again

The rejection letter from the witches’ coven stung, but she knew she had only herself to blame: She should have just ridden a broom for her tryout like everyone else.

Eunice gets a “Dear John” letter from her boyfriend in the service.

Its thirst for her love is unslakable/

Its determination, unshakable/

On the gravel it lies/

But it’s hoping to rise:/

The Rake’s progress is unmistakable..

Might the Owner’s Manual have been written by Tyne Daly?

The Love Letter: 

Paste (including the quote marks) 

"Category:Paintings by Edmund Blair Leighton" site=commons.wikimedia.org 

(syntax supported by the Google, Yahoo, Bing, Duckduckgo, Ecosia, and Yandex search engines) in the address bar (or search for it using one of those search engines) and click the first Category: found, and once there, search for the Billet text string, and click its link for info and links that point to more info about this roughly letter size, oil on panel painting.

Again, a larger strip image is shown by merely clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s THROWBACK THURSDAY: MASTERPIECE #1127 (1/15/15) (September 21, 2022) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment, and using the dropdown menu. I have added a comment there pointing to the blog entry with my comment pointing to the artist info I used to point to here. So far, 43 works by this artist have been used here (51 times total, including this Throwback Thursday and other repeats), the January 14, 2015, strip being its first use (the 19 hyperlinks in my comment there have been deactivated, and the line breaks removed, but perhaps the text remains informative). The August 22, 2022, strip is the prior non-repeat by him.

“‘Turn left and walk fifteen paces until you come to the privy. The treasure is buried inside.’ Well, they said it would be challenging…”

“The Ticket”

a good idea – jeebus knows people can only use very loud leaf blowers any more.

She really didn’t want her husband mansplain’ this one!

lulu looking for instructions on how to find the “on” switch for her rake.

how to garden in two easy steps

① hire a gardener

② make gin and tonics