Herman by Jim Unger for April 05, 2023

If the mob throws you off a bridge, that could be useful.

That is hard to fathom.

That’s 30 Mark Twians!

How about skinny homs? Settle for Full Fathom Five, Ding Dong.

He just needs a pair of cement shoes to go with that outfit.

Shouldn’t it be down to?

Few people go there, anyway.

Must be a shop in Florida. :D

Sell him the optional snorkel and it’s good to 80!

It’s perfect for Inspector Jacques Clouseau AND Jacques Cousteau.

Just stick your right hand under the button Napolean.

According to the documentation on my FirBit, it is operational down to a depth of 50 meters.

If I am under 50 meters of water, I’ve got bigger problems than a FitBit that doesn’t work. Besides my pool is nowhere close to being 50 meters deep.

That comic would have worked better if he had been wearing concrete shoes.

“Don’t worry about the sleeves. They’ll ride up with wear.” (Are You Being Served? quote)

Can you do something about the arms and the collar?

The Return of Sausage Face!

The coats that are designed to go much deeper are in the Trench coat line.

…and bullet proof.

But the enormous brass helmet costs extra.

And you can get cement galoshes to go with that.

The Luca Brasi brand of mens-wear.

A serious consideration if you’re living in California right now :-(