Moderately Confused by Jeff Stahler for May 26, 2023

Clueless snowflake

What, no popcorn?

I don’t go any more because the seats are way to big for me to sit in for more than 30 minutes at a time. I do reallllly miss the popcorn, however.

The second one is one of many reasons I quit going.

I rarely go because I need closed captions

I haven’t been to a movie theatre in over 20 years. Don’t really miss it.

The theater at home has many more amentias:

Parking is never a problem, the movies always start exactly when I get there, I can watch movies in my pajamas, I can eat whatever I want, I can pause the movie to go to the bathroom and it’s a lot closer, I can watch from a horizontal position, every seat has a good view, I can take my dog with me and I can drink wine.

Finally, I can get everyone in for the price of one ticket.

With facial recognition, it will become easier to bar such a guy from movie theaters for life.

It took me quite a while to realize that: (1) he was looking at his phone in his theater seat while the movie was playing; and (2) the movie he was unable to pause was the one on the big screen, not on his phone. (I’d been guessing that he was watching something on his phone while waiting in line for the restroom, and then, when it was his turn, couldn’t get the pause button to work.) Maybe if I’d ever been in a theater during the cell phone era the situation would have been clearer to me.

I know, right?

And you dumped a box of Skittles.

Once every 1 to 2 hours, I can never go to a theatre again…

Why did he want to take a bath at the movies?