Gil Thorp by Henry Barajas and Rachel Merrill for July 05, 2023

- Milford coach learns of title in newspaper next day

Is that the guard escorting him to prison?

What sound does Flick make?

…and the paper magically unfolds and hands in Gil’s hands.

A giant has fallen. Though I highly doubt this means the end of his hatred of gil. I mean now he can use death rays

Too bad Gil didn’t show up for the state title game. He would have known then he’s State Champion Gil Thorp – again. The sweatshop is working 24/7/365 to produce SCGT t shirts, hats, mugs, other apparel and paraphernalia. Operators are standing by to take your orders now.

Looks like Lukey finally got the press coverage that he has been craving for decades.

The new sheriff in town arrests the self-proclaimed new sheriff in town…

So…Milford’s win (forfeit, actually) over VT won the state championship, and not just the Valley conference title? And what happens to the girls? Is there any continuity here?

Too bad this is just the end of Year One, and not the author’s one year.

Kwan just a pawn in game of life…

Who else thinks that “Milford Wins State” should take priority — including the lead photo — over Martinez? And who else thinks the cop in P3 looks like Gil’s nephew? But paper girl on bike in P1 and Gil’s stubble in P3 are nice touches. Prediction: Gil will reach out magnanimously to Martinez to start him on the road to rehabilitation — let the healing begin.

P3 Gil sprouts sympathy hairs for his fallen adversary.

I’m hoping Luke gets hired as head groundskeeper at the golf club, and tries to go all Carl Spackler on Gil. Or maybe he doesn’t get hired but does in his mind he and spends all summer singing “great green gobs of greasy grimes Gilly guts” while checking out Mimi’s hind quarters…

Luke’s interview to the press: “… it’s all Thorp’s fault…”

There are consequences for having your whole team quit? Who knew?

“End of Year One.” I actually bothered to go look. Barajas’ 1st strip was 7/11/2022.

Agree with Charks. After papergirl’s accurate FLICK that WAPS a stubbled GilPa in the noggin, he has a V8 instead of an old fashioned to start his day. What an opportunity to rehabilitate Lukey and get a proven QB. I smell a humanitarian of the year award.

When was the last time anyone saw a kid on a bike delivering papers?

I love the fact that the newspaper led with the coach being fired instead of the team winning state.

Let’s all hope that “Year Two” is better written and much more easily comprehended than was “Year One”…

It was too late to remove Luke from the Coach of the Year nominations. With the VT football victory over Milford, he’s the current favorite.

Great, there’s an “Unfollow” button. If only there were a “Follow Storyline” one, too.

End of Year One Report Card:

Gil – C (being generous here)

Mimi – B+

Keri – D

Jami – C

Kaz – B++ (for having the good sense to get out)

BHHL – D-

Meemaw – C (for not having the good sense to check out)

Marty Moon – B+ (for a year of sobriety)

ToBe – D-

Beth the Bartendress – A- (for making Gil’s stiff Old Fashioneds)

Pedro the pitcher – A

Pedro the Pool Boy – Incomplete, whereabouts unknown

Kareem Abdul Jabbar – A+ (for the Apache Offense, or whatever it was called)

Rod Whigham – C+

Henry Barajas – F-

Snarker Nation – A++

And they said there’s never anything good in the papers these days.

From today’s Comics Curmudgeon:

Ahh, there’s nothing like waking up on a fine summer morning, picking up the morning dead tree paper, and seeing the banner headline that your hated rival was not only fired but escorted off the field by a police officer. Gil is too “old school” to have already learned this via Marty Moon’s podcast or TikTok or whatever like everyone else did, so this is a pretty great way for him to start the day. It’s nice that the paper reminded Gil that he also won a championship himself, in case he forgot.

So, which team won the State Championship? Was it in baseball or softball, and was it the JV or the varsity?

MILFORD ENQUIRER FIRES BARAJAS!!!!!! ORDERED TO RETURN BERRILL MEMORABILIA!!!!!!

Couldn’t resist, Henry. I promise I don’t have a dartboard of you in my apartment.

P1- Flick of the wrist. I wonder what she’s listening to.

P3- (Gil thought bubble): “Now it’s my turn to grow a goatee and be the badass around here.”

P1: I believe that could be the Russian Firebug ( Mom is in town to see Luhm again. She loves to see that flamethrower.) The flick is the Bic that sets off the Molotov cocktail that burns this year to the ground.

So does Martinez get a job doing radio commentary? MOON & MARTINEZ has a ring to it and would keep this sports psychotic around for future plots.

Gil flips to the Metro section: “City council votes in emergency session to erect ANOTHER larger-than-life statue of State Champion Gil Thorp. Library Board member tasered when he started ranting in opposition to a motion to change the town name from Milford to Gilford.”

Is this the first time in 60-whatever years that we’ve seen Gil unshaven? Was he up until the wee hours pounding down stiff Old Fashioneds? Seems more like Moon territory. And speaking of territory, Mopped Up Thorp occupies a permanent spot in the bizarre territory.

https://moppedupthorp.wordpress.com/2023/07/05/another-earned-title/

schadenfreude time…

Gil failed The Edge credit card test today.

No post-game interview with Luke? I suppose it’s hard to hold the mike in a strait jacket.

P-1: Gil is inspired. Next year, why not use a latteral?

P-2: Chubby alert!

P-3: When VT fires you, they “Perp” walk you. Keri better return those rings.

Tomorrow’s Milford Bugle Editor’s remarks: Sorry readers, there was a minor error in yesterday’s Headline. It should have read Milford JV wins State. The Varsity finished Second in the Valley to Valley Tech.

Gil looks like he’s wearing shoulder pads under his tee-shirt.

Year one Masterpiece.

What’s that thing girl’s reading?

Well, you definitely got Henry’s and Rod’s grades right. #wtfyoudouchnozzlesgofindarealjob

Waking up from week-long bender, Gil is delighted to learn that his team went on from the conference championship to win state!