Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for September 01, 2023

In the 1950’s, they were telling people not to get polio vaccine because the US Public Health Service is infiltrating by Russian doctors. Fluoridated water had rat poison. Mental Hygiene was a plot “to transform a free and intelligent people into a cringing horde of zombies.” And that plot was being run by the Jews.

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Looks like RAT is in the right frame of mind for the upcoming apocalypse in 2024, aka the next election!!!! Dan aka…

so sad, so possible

Next year our flat Earth is going to be flipped like a pancake and everyone will be crushed, so I’m going to hide out in the capsule that was used in the fake moon landing footage. Thank you for the advance warning and advice, Mr. Trump.

Pastis, do you really want to start another conspiracy theory?

Rat the right-winger

Exactly one of the reasons I left Facebook and Twitter, they became a cesspool of crackpot theories and Qanon b.s.

So it’s not just me. August is known as “silly season” in Europe but this year things really appear to have got out of hand. My new mantra has been “don’t engage, don’t engage.” Good to know I’m not alone, Goat.

Those electromagnetic waves cause cancer as well.

Well, for quite a while now I’ve been making anyone giving me a shot promise me that it won’t make me autistic. So far, they’ve all promised me, and so far it’s worked, I think…

Goldwater was going to cancel Social Security. Reagan was going to start WW3. Bush 43 faked his service in the Reserves. Trump colluded with Russians. Hunter’s laptop didn’t exist. Climate change is all man-made. Covid vaccines were bad until Biden was sworn in. Rioters without guns almost overthrew the government. So sure, Bill Gates is going to kill us all.

Mainstream media also cause similar effect on feeble minds.

If it’s on the internet it must be true, right Rat?!

now, why didn’t he mention chemtrails? That sounds suspicious…

Goat forgot to wear his tinfoil hat

And don’t even discuss what makes a person go blind!

Don’t panic; we’re all gonna die.

But don’t worry Bill Gates will continue to buy up as much farm land as possible so some day he’ll declare he is going let it go fallow to starve us.

Nonsense!! The bankers are in a spaceship on the other side of the moon and they use lasers, not electromagnetic waves. But Bill Gates is behind it, it all started with Windows.

Morning Steph, you make rat a lot dumber than than I thought, than again, all human rats are extremely dumb.

The iPad tells me weekly how much time I spend. I’m glad it keeps mum about where I go. I’m sure my ISP reports to the govt.

Be Careful Out There.

Social media is the cause of our self esteem issues.

He should try helping out that poor Nigerian prince…

How can there be a center earth when it’s flat? Waz Amater U?

Pastis actually wrote this BEFORE Alex Jones actually claimed that the Maui fires were set by the “Deep State” using a “Direct Energy Weapon.” And when Donnie gets back into power, he will expose the people who did it and hang them on national television.

I don’t use social media anymore. I don’t regret it that much.

Don’t forget the Joys of Bidenomics.

That’s hollow, FLAT, earth!

Know your enemy

Spending too much time on GoComics makes laugh, and groan, and cry, and comment. Ahhhhh!

Gates is a wack job!

This summer I decided to set aside three nights a week for reading (actual, published) fiction instead of turning on the computer or the TV. It has been delightful.

Yeah. I get sick of hearing people who want to know “what both sides are saying.” Garbage in, garbage out. Limit the information you consume to what comes from reliable sources, and even then, keep your consumption low. If it’s something you need to know, you’ll learn it soon enough.

Do your own research and when you’re done, do some more. All information is biased and everyone who spouts it is likely a fraud.

Anyone capable of critical thinking can see through that garbage and enjoy the entertaining, informative and enjoyable items that can still be found in social media. The problem is the critical lack of critical thought.

I hear that aluminum hats can help mitigate those waves…

and here is born another cult

And here I thought it was Elon Musk’s army of bankers.

When folks can’t tell fact from fiction, nothing can help them.

Why does this page become Unresponsive so much??

His “waves” are D.C. and only wiggle when extracting your coins.

That’s where they build the Jewish Space Lasers.

But won’t the Jewish space laser crack the Earth and show that’s hollow?

It’s a good thing we know this is false since the Earth is really flat.

Rat, that is untrue. (The nanobots implanted in my bloodstream by Bill Gates’ vaccine made me write that!)

At the center of the earth you’re weightless because the gravitational attraction of the surface is equal in all directions at the center. There are science fiction stories that use that.

At least Rat doesn’t think the Earth is flat.

I hear ya, Rat!

That sort of belief once held great entertainment value. Cheap magazines and tabloids at the checkout counters were full of it. And you could send a SASE (self addressed stamped envelope) to various PO boxes, mostly on the West Coast, and receive volumes of mimeographed or carbon copy versions of screeds and rants that made the the most outrageous claims. All gone now.

I long ago came to the conclusion that people believe in conspiracies to justify their world view.

Rat just made himself the poster-boy for Irony!

I did leave Facebook and Twitter, but not because of crackpot theories. I didn’t see those in my feeds over the years. But I’m tempted to leave Instagram for that reason. You “like“ a bunch of cute dog and cat videos or memes and then Instagram places on your feed stuff you wouldn’t even think of touching with a 10-ft pole. Why? Because of the convoluted way social media now works with, which is mentioned in their terms of use.

Why do you get some person talking about an outlandish thing in your feed? Maybe the poster of the cute dog video has a friend or contact who also has a friend or contact who reacted, liked or disliked that crackpot thing hours, days or months ago, but you get to see it. Worse than cable TV.