Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for January 14, 2024

Probably, and I hope they do. It all depends on the weight of fluid displaced of course. I don’t know about the decoys or charioteers though.

The puddle-duck decoys yes. The unsupervised charioteers no, but maybe if they had supervision.

And they point too.

Floats my boat.

The young lady’s decoy pack will certainly float — if the crowd on her balcony don’t capsize her rig.

HER charioteers just might float across the ocean in a hurricane!!

With OR without supervision!!

If she’s talking about what I think she’s talking about, they certainly will…

In the event of a water landing, her chest can be used as a flotation device…for at least three people.

Finally, a sensible pump.

We all float down here. And sometimes, our bundled Cable/Internet breaks under the weight of snowflakes gently floating downward for several hours with temps just slightly above freezing, say thirty-three or thirty-four degrees Fahrenheit, so we go unsupervised for a few days.

only one way to tell if they’ll float

Well, I can bet she’s wearing an over the shoulder boulder holder and they will float just fine! and the buoyancy is amazing!

Sir Vladimir: What also floats in water?

Peasant 1: Bread

P3: Apples

P2: Very small rocks

P1: Cider

P3: Grape gravy

P1: Cherries

P3: Mud

King: A Duck!

V: Exactly! So, logically…

P1 (thinking): If she ways the same as a duck… she’s made of wood!

All: A witch! burn her burn her!!

Moreover, she can hold her breath longer than any of us.

…in my mind…

…I feel this attractive…

…empowered woman…

…is the winner of the secret, You, too, Can Be In Frog Applause, contest…

…{ or, at least, her image is}…

…you had to read between the lines to find a link…

…that leads to a certain page…

…of a certain Dan Brown book…

…once you figure out that every third line on every third paragraph…

…you’ll see how to complete a photo of hundreds of manatees getting warm together at Siesta Key…

…highlight the numbers letters being created by their layout…

…and call every number one above them …

…and you get get to send your email …

..where you will receive an essay form…

…which you complete and send back…

…the fifth one with no grammar errors wins a chance into a drawing to be in Frog Applause…

‘Unsupervised charioteers’ — did anyone else get an image of an ancient version of Demolition Derby? The horses were probably a little too smart for that.

She’s an excellent spokesmodel for the latest in newsprint blouses, isn’t she? There’s no need for her patter to make sense, then.

Superduper!

Well, what do you expect? Unsupervised charioteers are nothing but trouble.

“Unsupervised charioteers” kept me laughing for several hours.

Some decoys are more effective than others, that’s why my whistle is always at the ready.

Conceal a pond on the track.

Ben Hur would approve.

Journal of Comic Strip Coincidences—14 Jan 2024—SMBC, Crabgrass: Comments note Calvin & Hobbes influence

Is it silicone or is it real? There’s only one way to find out.

Oh. Wait, Maybe two. Throw her into the Old Witch Pond and see if she floats. If she does, she’s obviously a witch, so stick her with a pitchfork (you know where) until she submerses and drowns.

It just seems to me that puddle-duck decoys and charioteers, even unsupervised ones, are two less relevant things today, and do not deserve our steadfast attention….

[Truth is, she reminds me of someone I knew years ago!]

…my phones AI is my worst critic…twice now I’ve written about …in glorious English…

..how Star Trek…

…[without mentioning it by name]…is a imperialistic, sexist organization…

…only so I could equate sending out the Enterprise to …

…unsupervised charioteers…

…and this…

…this piece of crappy group think artificial intelligence…

…turns my phone off…

… CON! …

Oi sigh gib, oi sigh gibbenee. Oi sigh gib, oi sigh gibbenee. Gib-gib. Nee-nee. (2nd verse, same as the first!) Oi sigh gib, oi sigh gibbenee….. etc, ad infinitum, ad nauseam………… … . …….. …. . . ………………… … . .. . ………….. … ……………. ….

Generally, an unemployment rate of 3% or less is considered to be full employment. The current unemployment rate in Arkansas is 3.3%. No wonder it’s so hard to find floating charioteer supervisors.

I have no desire to sink to that level, even if I have to pool my resources.

She’s, uh, ample.