Shoe by Gary Brookins and Susie MacNelly for March 16, 2024

Isn’t there some sort of TV ad blocker?…..

I want protection from lawyer commercials!

Why doesn’t Santa have to provide health insurance for his workers?

They’re technically Elf employed.

What kind of health insurance do Halloween creatures have?

Medi-SCARE!

I am trying to get tornado insurance for my campsite, but the companies keep denying my application.

They told me, “If your tent gets blown away, you won’t be covered.”

My son turned 27, so he’s no longer covered by my health insurance.

In other words, his manufacturer’s warranty is up.

Getting good dental insurance…

…is like pulling teeth.

My health insurance company refused to pay my bill because I believe in reincarnation.

They said I have a pre existing condition.

New glasses are $144 after insurance.

That’s gross!

What kind of insurance does an I.T. guy have to sign up for?

Malware practice.

I have to write a paper about insurance, and I need to use in-text citations.

So I think I’ll get a quote.

A fishing boat recently capsized when the fish on one side of the net all swam down. Insurance refused to pay out.

They argued it was an act of cod.

Books work.

Erin Esurance can attack me any time.

It’s Ned Ryerson, everyone could use some life insurance, am I right, am I right?

Life insurance – you’re paying money to bet with the insurance company that you’re going to die, and they’re betting that you’re going to live … and you hope they win the bet.

Especially the ones with Flo

That’s $4.99 per month, Cosmo. Cash only.

God bless whose have free-ads streaming

Closed captioning with all the sound off, plus a good book in your lap.

I’m self insured. There’s enough in the bank to plant me, naturally.

Instead of ever increasing insurance, why don’t they focus on making the world less dangerous?

If they give me “Liberty” again, they’re gonna give me death.

And pillow and Medicare and gold sales and those disgusting lume commercials . . .

Here at Corleone Insurance (subsidiary of Godfather Saving and Loan), your life is important to us. It’d be a shame if anything unfortunate happened.

It’ called the mute button, Shoe.

Cut the cable. Dump the antenna. Through high speed internet you can block all ads if you are willing to pay for it. On your computer try AdBlocker Ultimate. Sign up with streaming channels such as Britbox, Disney-Hulu, PBS, Peacock. Choose the premium package & commercials are gone.

ADS are for selling things to people (like me),who can’t afford commercial free programming.

..and drug commercials, soap commercials, especially lawyer commercials, all commercials. My favorite remedy, the mute button.

Please spare me the song-and-dance drug commercials!

You need dependents before you need life insurance.

Why not have a “Commercial Channel”? That way, if someone wants to watch commercials, they can go to that channel.

All those commercials for gambling, online or otherwise, are just as annoying to me.

I keep seeing the one where the guys keep screaming at the woman that she’s “Sitting on a Gold Mine”.

Apparently, whoever came up with that idea never heard the joke about the Hooker “sitting on a Gold Mine”.