Cornered by Mike Baldwin for March 23, 2024

Look out for “dread” bugs.

Every bed comes with free extras. Lots of ‘em. And, look! They’re moving. Instant entertainment and hours of sleepless fun.

The “sniff” part comes a few days later.

Think I’d find a better quality mattress store.

Bugsy’s Used Matress Emporium

Bedbugs included at no extra charge.

And what are those yellow and red stains??!!

Pre loved.

Scratch n’ sniff.

Always wondered where the old hotel mattresses went.

Some people get so disgusted when I tell them that hundreds of women have been on my mattress. Well, I don’t always tell them I got a good deal on the floor display.

Bed Bug Emporium?

Caveat emptor….

some things just need to be bought new

used…by bedbugs….

Do I at least get a guarantee to have them exterminated? OY

I’ve had a furniture store for 29 years. I have never been able to sell a used mattress because it is illegal in my state. Most auctions sell “used beds” but they are a headboard, a footboard, and side rails, and the mattress is FREE they say."

This gives me the willies!

Just don’t scratch and sniff…

Never buy a used matress!

Sales of mattresses with bedbugs sore this time of year.

Pre-bugged

Formerly from a house of ill-repute, so plenty of crabs.

Go scratch!

Probably true.

I think it was Jim Gaffigan that said if someone offered you a free used mattress that 500 people have already slept on, you would tell them to burn that thing. But if it’s a hotel, you gladly pay $300 a night to sleep in that same bed.

sleep tight! ☺

Ewwwwww!!!

These beds are buggin’ me!