From Not Always Right: My Family And Other Zombies
(I have had a migraine at work. The manager has called my brother to come pick me up while I take my medication and sit in the staff room with a wet towel over my head. The tablets completely throw me out and whenever someone tries to talk to me I can only muster a grunt.)
Manager: “He’s just in here. He hasn’t moved much so I think he’s sleeping.”
Colleague: “No, he’s been moaning every now and again. I rinsed his towel for him.”
Brother: “Oh, that’s fine. Just typical. Come on then, Zombie-[My Name].” lifting my towel “See, he’s even drooling. He must be hungry. Let’s get you some brains!”
(He practically carries me out of the store, telling anyone who noticed that I was turning into a zombie. Sadly one family took it seriously and fled the store. I found it hilarious, but I was too drained — I couldn’t show it until after the migraine had passed, two days later.)
j_m_kuehl 6 months ago
well they sure aren’t going for your brains
Yakety Sax 6 months ago
From Not Always Right: My Family And Other Zombies
(I have had a migraine at work. The manager has called my brother to come pick me up while I take my medication and sit in the staff room with a wet towel over my head. The tablets completely throw me out and whenever someone tries to talk to me I can only muster a grunt.)
Manager: “He’s just in here. He hasn’t moved much so I think he’s sleeping.”
Colleague: “No, he’s been moaning every now and again. I rinsed his towel for him.”
Brother: “Oh, that’s fine. Just typical. Come on then, Zombie-[My Name].” lifting my towel “See, he’s even drooling. He must be hungry. Let’s get you some brains!”
(He practically carries me out of the store, telling anyone who noticed that I was turning into a zombie. Sadly one family took it seriously and fled the store. I found it hilarious, but I was too drained — I couldn’t show it until after the migraine had passed, two days later.)
NOT my story.
Walrus Gumbo Premium Member 6 months ago
Actually, Eno, all that beer will make you well marbled with fat. You’d be a delicacy!
Sanspareil 6 months ago
Don’t worry Eno, the zombies are after brains, so you are quite safe!
mourdac Premium Member 6 months ago
No fears from Zombie Flanders.
Knightman Premium Member 6 months ago
Zombies can’t harm you Eno. They can’t get near you by a nose!!!
silverclaw33 6 months ago
Rule #1: Cardio
colddonkey 6 months ago
Your safe they just want your brain which you already lack.
assrdood 6 months ago
The pink fridge will ward them off.
PoodleGroomer 6 months ago
A keg takes up less space and you don’t have to risk going outside with the empties.
Jeff0811 6 months ago
Reminds me of someone I know who would be protected from fat head to big toe.
Frank Burns Eats Worms 6 months ago
He wants to beat ’em to the paunch.
the lost wizard 6 months ago
How does more beer help? Of all the stupid questions. :)
KEA 6 months ago
dunno but I thought Zombies went for brains… oh, wait…
wildlandwaters 6 months ago
c’mon, impkins…where’s the burp…
mistercatworks 6 months ago
They don’t go for the belly. They eat BRAINS!
Otis Rufus Driftwood 6 months ago
Zombies I thought wanted brains. If so, Eno will be fine.