Agnes by Tony Cochran for June 30, 2024

…. and they don’t walk on earth

Lucky that you didn’t see any girl groups. You’d be traumatized.

2 hours in the makeup and hair chairs, plus wardrobe. Any guys at school can be Swizzle Twizzle.

Oh my, our girls are growing up! Well at least maybe Trout is.

And having all their teeth is a big plus

I bet they bathe more than once a month too…

How could we normals even HOPE to compete with such unattainable standards???

(and then he pulled another snack off his shirt)

My mom said she picked Dad because he was the only guy in their high school with polished shoes and clean fingernails (she said he picked her because of a tight “M&M Big Reds”* T-shirt and a pair of red short shorts; he has never denied that).

*Their HS and mascot.

But I’m sure that they have beautiful minds. Just like I did at that age. :)

Also easier and safer to infatuate from afar.